


Something Old, Something New

by Jadeqaf



Series: Wild Beginnings Universe [3]
Category: Queer as Folk (US)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-05
Updated: 2018-07-05
Packaged: 2019-06-05 13:02:03
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 31,315
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15171314
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jadeqaf/pseuds/Jadeqaf
Summary: Post season 2. Gus asks about the wedding he was too young to remember. Bad memories ensue.





	Something Old, Something New

**Author's Note:**

> Mentions of drug abuse, domestic violence,

2022~~~~~~

"Hey Gus. Why'd you knock? You usually just walk right in." Michael smiled at his son and let him in.

"Couldn't find my keys." Gus walked into the room with confidence and grace.

Michael had a flashback to Gus's father at the same age. All sex appeal and charm. They were definitely two peas in a pod. "So, what's up?"

Gus followed Michael into the study and stopped. "Sorry, didn't know you had company."

Justin laughed. "Since when am I company?" At 40, Justin didn't look much older than he did the night his life changed forever. He still had blond hair and a smile that radiated pure sunshine.

"You're right Uncle Justin. You're not company." Gus moved across the room to embrace the man who was almost a third father. "So, where's Dad?"

Justin laughed. "He's here somewhere. Probably standing in front of a mirror. He's gained five pounds in the last month and he's obsessing about it."

Gus burst out laughing. "Wait a minute. The gray hairs don't bother him, but five pounds that no one but him will notice and he's losing it?"

"He thinks the gray hairs make him look distinguished. The five pounds are just fat." Michael laughed. He'd never understood his lover's obsession with his looks. To Michael, he would always be the young, beautiful young man he' d fallen in love with when he was 14. Now that they were 52, the love was only stronger. "So Gus, you didn't answer my question. What are you doing here?"

"Something came up in one of my classes and I wanted to talk to you and Dad about it. Having Uncle J here is a bonus."

Justin smiled at the young man in front of him. To Justin's everlasting regret, he'd never had children. None of his relationships had lasted long enough, so Gus was as close as he'd ever be likely to get. Gus was now 23 and in his first year of law school and often engaged in lively debates with anyone who would sit still long enough. "Which class?"

Gus walked over to the mini-bar and poured himself a drink. "The History of Gay Rights."

Michael and Justin exchanged amused looks. "Don't you know enough about that subject to teach it?" Michael was so proud of Gus. The knowledge of what his family had fought so hard for, acceptance and equal rights, made him want to fight for those things for everyone. He wanted to be a civil rights attorney.

"That's what my professor said. I'm the only person in the class who was raised by four parents, plus various aunts and uncles, most of whom are gay. My professor often asks me to speak from personal experience."

"So, what happened to bring you here?" Michael sat down on the couch and watched his son pace. Something was obviously bothering him, he rarely hesitated to speak his mind.

"My professor and I discovered that he knows you." Gus sat on the chair across from the couch.

"Oh really? How?"

"His name is Hank Cameron." Gus watched his father's face go pale.

"Hank Cameron? David's son?" Michael's voice was tight and he felt slightly woozy. He was glad he was sitting down.

"Pop. You ok?" Gus moved over next to Michael, concern etched in his face. He never noticed Justin quietly leave the room.

Justin walked through the house looking for Brian. He finally found him in the bathroom studying himself in the mirror. "You look fine. Michael needs you."

Brian turned from his reflection. "What's up?"

"Gus showed up. His History of Gay Rights professor is Hank Cameron."

"Shit." Brian rushed from the room, anxious to be by Michael's side.

When Brian reached Michael's side, he was still pale. "Mikey." Brian pulled Michael into his arms, giving comfort.

Michael burrowed into Brian's chest, finding peace in the only place he felt at home. "Why does the sound of his name always do this to me? Fuck! It's been twenty years."

"I know. You are entitled to react however you want."

"I'm sorry Pop. You never talk about David. I thought he was just a speed bump on your way to a relationship with Dad." Gus hated that he'd caused Michael pain. He just couldn't keep from sticking his nose in to sore spots. First with the story of how he and Dad had moved from friends to lovers and now this.

Composed now, Michael reassured his son. "Gus, it's not your fault. It's something that I should be over by now. I don't know why I reacted that way. Probably because it's been so long since I heard that name. So, your professor is Hank Cameron. Imagine that. Did he say what his father is up to?"

"Yeah, he's still living in Portland. He's had a few relationships, but he's single right now." Gus wondered how much information he should pass on, but then remembered how strong Michael was. With Brian by his side, he could conquer anything. "And he's been asking about you."

Brian snorted. "What? Why has he been asking about Michael? The doc never stood a chance. Michael is mine. Always has been."

"Now Brian, it's been twenty years, and you won anyway. Give it a rest." Justin wasn't surprised at Brian's continued enmity toward a man he hadn't seen in two decades. David had tried to come between Michael and Brian. No one who did that was forgiven easily.

"Ok everyone, just cool down." As usual, Michael was the calm voice of reason. "Now Gus, what questions did the discovery that your professor is my ex-boyfriend's son bring up?"

Gus sat back down in the chair across from the couch. "He mentioned something about the wedding. He said that it was almost a total disaster, thanks in part to his father. What happened?"

The three other men in the room exchanged amused glances. "You've seen the video, that's what happened." Brian wasn't naive enough to believe that his son would buy that and he was right.

"Yes I've seen the video." After the talk about their beginnings, Michael and Brian had shown Gus the video to the wedding he didn't remember. "But I noticed that there is part of it missing. Oh, nothing important, but time definitely passes. And Dad, you start sprouting a bruise on your face." Gus had watched the video of the wedding several times before he'd noticed that.

Michael smirked at Brian. "Yeah, he just couldn't control himself."

Indigent, Brian tried to defend himself. "Hey, I didn't start it."

"Boys. It doesn't matter who started it." Justin broke in. He remembered the wedding, and as much as Brian and Michael loved each other, and as much as they wanted to pledge their love in front of everyone they knew, there were times he wasn't sure they were going to make it. It had taken quite a bit of work to get them married. "What did Hank say happened?"

"Something about Dad insulting David and them getting into a fight." Gus wondered why David had even been there. From what he'd heard, Michael hadn't even talked to David since the day he left Portland.

Justin snorted. "More like the other way around. But it's a long story. Do you have time to hear it?"

Gus got up and poured drinks for everyone, then sat back down. "Yes."

Michael and Brian settled into each other's arms. Now that the shock of hearing David's name had passed, Michael felt better. What happened leading up to and at the wedding wasn't a big deal in hindsight, but at the time, it had been enough to drive him nuts.

Justin sat in the other chair, across from his best friends. He saw the love that was evident in every move they made and felt a pang of envy. What they had was what he'd spent the last twenty years searching for. "Ok. I'll start this off."

"No, you weren't there when it started." Brian laughed at the memory.

"What? When did it start?" Justin was surprised that he didn't know the entire story. They had never kept secrets from him.

"You know when it started. It started two weeks before the wedding, the day before the final fitting for the tuxes." Michael reassured Justin that he hadn't been left in the dark.

"Ah yes. I remember now, you two were a mess when you got there." Justin remembered the anxiety and frustration that followed.

"What happened?" Gus decided that he had to know.

Brian laughed. "Ok. But when we are done, you go tell your professor to stop pumping you for information to pass to his father. It started two weeks before the wedding."

 

~~~~~

2012

 

 

"ARGHHHHH." Michael's scream echoed through the loft.

Brian dropped the menu he was staring at and ran into the bedroom. What he saw caused him to stop in his tracks and burst out laughing. Michael was standing next to the wall, pounding his head repeatedly. "Mikey, what the fuck are you doing?"

"I can't take it anymore. That woman is driving me insane." Frustration made Michael's voice tight.

Sighing, Brian pulled Michael away from the wall and into his arms. "What is it now? The seating plan? The flowers? The menu?"

"All of the above and more. How mad would she be if we eloped?" Michael's hopeful voice was muffled by the fact that his face was buried in Brian's chest.

"Furious. Just tell her to back off. It's our wedding, not hers." Michael burst into maniacal laughter. Hysteria was creeping in quickly. "Mikey. Snap out of it before I slap you."

Michael slowly regained control. "Sorry. But do you think that telling my mother to back off would work?"

Brian smiled ruefully. "I guess not. Just agree with her and then do what we want anyway." Brian knew that Debbie was driving Michael and Emmett crazy. Every time she came over, she had a list of changes to another one of their plans. Brian just let it roll off his back but Emmett had taken to avoiding the diner because Debbie's criticisms caused him to burst into tears.

"I've been trying. But now that we are two weeks from the wedding, she's getting worse. Brian, I'm losing my mind. All I want to do it marry you in front of our friends and family. Why can't she just let it be our day?" Michael's frustration boiled over as tears began to fall.

"I'll talk to her." Brian couldn't stand to see Michael in pain. He loved Deb dearly, but sometimes she had a problem with boundaries. It was time to fix that. "What was her latest call about?"

Michael shuddered. "It was the final straw. She called to tell me that she invited someone else to the wedding"

"Who'd she invite?"

"David." That one word conveyed a wealth of emotion, none of it positive.

"I thought you invited him."

"No, I sent him an announcement with all information that he could possibly use to find out when and where it was deleted. I wanted him to know that he was wrong. I just didn't want to see him." Michael knew it was childish, but he hadn't been able to resist.

"So, why did your mom invite him?"

"It seems that he called her and asked her about it. You know her; she can't keep her mouth shut. Next thing she knew, she was inviting him. He's coming." Michael couldn't believe it. He'd never told anyone the entire story of what happened in Portland. It had been messier than he'd led everyone to believe.

"Mikey, if you want to rub his nose in it, this will be perfect. You know that he will never believe it until he sees it with his own eyes." Brian relished the thought of David seeing him pledge his love to Michael. "Come on. There are going to be so many people there that you won't have to talk to him. And as for the seating chart, we'll put him next to your nasty aunt. The one who's only coming so she can tell her country club friends that she' s enlightened. You know, at the table next to the kitchen door."

Michael giggled. He could always count on Brian to make him feel better. "You are evil Brian. That's why I love you. Ok. David can come and I won't kill my mother. It's only two more weeks. I'm just not going to answer the phone between now and the wedding. You can talk to her. She likes you better than me."

Brian relaxed now that Michael was calmer. These panic attacks were getting more common. They were usually triggered by a conversation with his mother. He was definitely going to have to say something to her. "Fine. By the time this is over, I'm going to be the only one talking to her anyway. She's already pissed off Emmett by insulting the color scheme; she told Justin that his painting of us for the reception was boring and looked nothing like us. Now you. I'm surprised Vic's still talking to her."

Michael grimaced. "I talked him out of throwing the sample cake at her. She shouldn't have told him that it was too dry. Brian, please talk to her. She's not going to enjoy this day if everyone's mad at her." Michael knew he was being a coward by getting Brian to talk to his mother for him, but he couldn't. Every time he tried to tell her that she was driving him insane, she started with the guilt. God, he was 32 years old and his mother could still make him feel like a kid.

"So, did you get anything done before your mother called to challenge your sanity?" Brian led Michael into the living room. He smiled to see the boxes currently taking up space. They would be moving as soon as they returned from their honeymoon. They wanted a new place to reflect the new start.

Michael sat down on the couch. "Some things. But we still have a lot to do. We have the tux fittings tomorrow, and then we need to meet with the decorator about the house the next day. The band needs a list of songs we want." Michael's words were stopped by Brian's lips.

"Why don't we take tonight and tomorrow off? We won't deal with anything except the fitting. After we get done there, why don't we take Gus to the park? Just concentrate on us."

"Sounds wonderful. But what about Ma? You know she's going to be calling soon." Michael looked at his watch. It had been 45 minutes since he'd gotten off the phone with Deb. "I'm surprised she hasn't called back. I kind of hung up on her. " No sooner had the words left Michael's mouth than the phone started ringing. He sighed.

"I don't hear anything. We're not home." Brian kissed Michael slowly. "We're on a deserted island. No mothers, no ex-boyfriends." The answering machine picked up and Brian groaned. It was definitely Debbie and she was pissed.

"Michael Charles Novotny! Pick up the phone. I know you're there. Look. I have an idea for the music." Brian walked over to the answering machine and turned the volume down, then turned the ringer off.

"See, simple solution. We'll call her tomorrow, maybe." Brian walked back over to Michael and pulled him into his arms. "Now, we won't deal with anything but us for the rest of the night. Nothing about the wedding, or the new house. Just you and me."

Michael sighed. "That sounds great. So, what do you have in mind?"

"You, me, and a king sized bed." Brian pulled Michael toward the bedroom, unbuttoning his shirt on the way.

 

~~~~

A night of wild sex did wonders for Michael's peace of mind. He was in a much better mood, which was a good thing, because at 9, a horrible noise invaded his sleep. Someone was pounding on the door nonstop. Michael had a good idea who it was. He buried his head under his pillow. "Go away."

"Mikey, you need to talk to her." Brian pulled the covers off, sending Michael spinning.

"You said you would talk to her." A pout could be heard through the pillow still covering his head.

"I will." The pounding got louder. "But you need to be there too." Brian swore as he pulled on his jeans and tossed a pair of pants at Michael. "Come on."

"Fine." Michael crawled out of bed and pulled on the sweats Brian had tossed at him, just in time. Brian had opened the front door and a red haired demon came bursting through.

"MICHAEL CHARLES NOVOTNY!!!! Where the fuck have you been all night? I've been calling and calling and getting no answer." Anger and fear brought color to her cheeks.

"Deb." Brian's quiet voice interrupted the tirade. "We were here, we just didn't answer the phone."

"What? Why?" Deb stomped toward the bedroom, but she was stopped by Brian's hand on her arm.

"Because you are driving Michael insane. He had a panic attack after he talked to you yesterday. And it wasn't the first." Brian ran his hand through his hair. He had to find the words to get Deb to back off without hurting her.

"Why would he have a panic attack?"

"Because you keep trying to take over. And when he tries to get you to back off, you start with the guilt." Brian gently sat Deb down on the couch. "We love you. And we know that you just want this to be perfect, but it's our day, not yours."

"What are you talking about, Michael's never had a problem standing up to me. Remember Ben?" Deb tried to convince herself that Brian was mistaken.

"Deb, this is completely different and you know it."

"What I know is that my own son doesn't want me around." With that, Deb stood up and walked out of the loft before Brian could catch her.

"Shit." Brian tried to catch her, but the elevator was leaving just as he reached the doorway. And by the time he'd sped down the stairs, she was nowhere to be found. "Double shit." Brian headed back up to the loft, knowing that Deb's flight was only going to upset Michael more.

Sure enough, when he returned to the bedroom, Michael was in the midst of another panic attack. "I-I c-c-can't." Michael tried desperately to talk, but he couldn't catch his breath. He leaned over and put his head between his legs.

"Fuck Mikey." Brian moved quickly to Michael's side. "It's ok. She'll calm down and we can talk to her again. She's just upset."

"N-n-not h-h-her w-wedding."

"I know. If she wants a wedding done her way, she should just get off her ass and ask Carl to marry her."

Michael tried to laugh, but he couldn't catch his breath enough and it ended up sounding more like a bark.

"Ah Mikey, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to make you laugh when you can't breathe. Here, let's sit down." Brian was beginning to worry that Michael was having more than just a panic attack. He hadn't been this bad in the aftermath of his drug overdose. Maybe he should get Michael to talk to Dr. Sullivan about it.

Michael allowed Brian to sit him down on the bed. He was starting to breathe easier, but his chest hurt from the effort. It felt too much like his asthma attacks as a child, something he'd thought he'd outgrown at least ten years ago. "I shouldn't have hurt her like that."

"Michael, it's our day, not hers. And if we let her control this, she'll try to control the rest of our lives as well. She'll get over it, she always does."

"I know. But what else can go wrong today?" Michael relaxed in his lover's arms.

Michael was going to regret asking that question.

 

2

~~~

"Michael, it's our day, not hers. And if we let her control this, she'll try to control the rest of our lives as well. She'll get over it, she always does."

"I know. But what else can go wrong today?" Michael relaxed in his lover's arms.

Michael was going to regret asking that question.

~~~~~

When Brian and Michael showed up at the tux shop, they noticed that Ted was waiting outside for them. "What's up Schmidt? Can't figure out how to open the door?" Brian may have mellowed somewhat, but he'd never be a nice guy.

"Fuck you Brian. I wanted to warn you." Ted paced the sidewalk as he debated how to break the news.

"What?" Michael had a very bad feeling about this. His breathing started getting erratic.

"The tux shop was bought last week. And the new owners are slightly homophobic."

"No. I can't." Michael struggled to breathe.

"Mikey. It's ok. We can fix it." Brian nailed Ted with a nasty look. "So, what's the problem?"

"They won't rent tuxes for a gay wedding."

Michael's head started swimming. "I-I-I-." He gave up trying to speak and concentrated on trying to remember how to breathe.

"Oh really?" Ted immediately felt sorry for whoever was going to catch Brian 's wrath. "We'll see about that." Brian remembered Melanie's tears when her wedding to Lindsey fell apart. Now he understood how she felt. "Open the door Ted."

Brian helped Michael into the shop and sat him down on the nearest chair. Thankfully, Justin and Emmett were already there. "Justin, I need..." Before Brian could finish, Justin was by Michael's side.

"I see Ted told you." Justin rubbed Michael's back, trying to help him regain his equilibrium. He hated seeing his best friend like this. "It's ok Superman. Brian will fix it." Justin met Brian's gaze with a look that said that Brian had better fix it.

Leaving Michael in Justin's capable hands, Brian approached the clerk. It was the same clerk who'd worked there the last time they'd been in, a young woman about 23. "Hello, Courtney."

"Mr. Kinney, I'm sorry. There's nothing I can do. Mr. Anderson was very specific. I can't afford to lose this job."

"Relax. I've got an idea. Cancel our order, and write a new one for the same date. Change the name of the bride to Michelle. That way, it's on paper as a straight wedding and you won't get in trouble for renting them to us." Brian could see the relief on Courtney's young face.

"That's brilliant."

"Yes I am. Now, do you like this job?"

"Not anymore. The new owner has wandering hands. But I help support my mom."

Brian looked at Michael. "I understand that. Do you want to work in retail, or would you like a chance to work in an office with creative people?" He'd gotten to know the pretty brunette while he and Michael had spent hours trying to find tuxes that suited them. He really liked her. She didn't deserve the spot her new boss was putting her in.

"I would love to work in an office. I've been trying to go to business school, but it's expensive."

Brian reached into his wallet and removed one of his business cards. "Monday, call this number and ask for Cynthia. She'll have a job for you."

With a shaking hand and tears in her eyes, she took the card from Brian. "But why?"

Brian looked over at Michael, who'd regained his breath. "Let's just say that I'm repaying an old debt."

"Thank you Mr. Kinney."

"Please, call me Brian. Now, I have two favors to ask of you. One, please come to the wedding. And two, please don't leave here until then. I would feel better if you were still here that day."

Courtney smiled and Brian was dazzled by her warmth. "Mr....I mean Brian, I would be delighted to come to the wedding. Now, shall we get on with the fittings?"

"Thank you Courtney." Brian walked over to Michael. "Hey babe, you feeling better?"

"Yeah. I'm beginning to feel like Lindsay though." Michael moved into Brian' s outstretched arms, drawing strength from the other half of his soul.

"Don't worry. We'll get through this, I promise." Brian held tight to Michael as if willing his strength into him. "Mikey, these panic attacks are starting to worry me. Maybe you should call Dr. Sullivan."

 

"I have an appointment on Tuesday. I think I can get through until then." Michael was still in therapy, trying to put the stress of his attack behind him.

"Good. Looks like Emmett and Ted are done. In you go." When Michael was out of view, Brian walked over to his best man. "Hey sunshine."

"Hey Brian. How's Michael?"

"Better. At least until the next crisis hits." Brian ran his hand over his face. "And we still need to deal with Deb.

"What did she do this time?" Justin's harsh tone made it obvious that he hadn't forgiven her yet.

"She invited David to the wedding."

"She did what?" Justin couldn't believe that Deb would do that, no matter how pushy she was being."

"Michael sent him a doctored announcement, no date, no place. But I guess he called Deb. And she invited him."

"Michael must have freaked."

"That was nothing compared to this morning."

"What happened?" Justin glanced at the door to Michael's fitting room. No wonder he was having panic attacks.

"We turned off the phone last night. Michael needed to relax. Well, this morning, Deb showed up in full temper. When I asked her to back off, she stormed out of saying that Michael doesn't love her."

"Fuck! Think I should talk to her?"

"No. This is something we need to do. We have to set some boundaries or she' s going to walk all over our relationship." Brian wondered if he should ask Justin if he knew anything about Michael's panic attacks. But before he could decide, the door to the fitting room opened. Michael was done.

"Your turn Brian." Michael walked out, still not feeling like himself. Brian and Justin exchanged concerned looks and Justin nodded.

Brian disappeared behind the door, leaving Justin and Michael to talk. "Hey Superman. How are you feeling?"

"Tired. I can't wait until the wedding is over. Did Brian tell you about Ma?"

"Yes he did. Are you going to be ok with David there?" Justin could see the shadows in Michael's eyes and swore to himself. He'd thought he'd seen the last of them.

"No. But I don't have much choice. He's coming and I can't stop him."

"Michael, what's going on? These panic attacks are not a normal reaction to pre-wedding stress."

Michael smiled. "Boy wonder, how would you know?"

"Good point. But I think there's something else going on here." Justin put his hand on Michael's shoulder. "Talk to me."

 

Michael wished he could talk to his best friend, but he couldn't. "Thanks, but I can't. Not right now." Michael embraced Justin, holding tight to his courage.

"Every time I see you two, you have your arms around each other. Is there something you would like to tell me?" Brian's dry voice only caused Michael and Justin to laugh.

"Are we done here?" Michael wanted to leave. He felt as if he was about to jump out of his skin. He needed to stop thinking for a while.

"Sure. I just need to tell Courtney something." Brian kissed Michael on the cheek and walked away.

Michael's eyes followed Brian's progress across the floor. He never tired of watching his lover move with that feline grace.

"He's worried about you." Justin softly spoke.

"I know. But I have an appointment with Dr. Sullivan on Tuesday. And once we leave here, we aren't talking about the wedding or the house until Monday."

Justin smiled at Michael's lovesick expression. "And will you be leaving the bedroom?"

Michael's head whipped around and pinned Justin with a glare. "Of course. Brian and I don't spend all our time fucking."

"Yeah, some times there's sucking involved." Brian laid his arm across Michael's shoulder and turned a lascivious grin on Justin.

Michael's indigent expression caused Justin to burst into laughter. "Our lives do not revolve around sex."

Brian could see the hurt in Michael's eyes and reassured him. "Of course not. I love you." Brian hugged Michael close.

"I know. It's just... I don't know what it is." Michael's edginess increased. "I'm leaving." Michael pulled away from Brian and walked out the door.

"Brian, I'm troubled by the way Michael's acting. He won't talk to me. He's never hidden anything from me before."

Brian remembered other times Michael had hidden stuff from him, but he'd thought those days were behind them. "He usually does it when the pain's too great. It's like he thinks that if he keeps a lid on it, it won't hurt so bad. He'll talk when he's ready." Kissing Justin on the cheek, Brian followed Michael out the door.

Justin watched the doorway for a long minute. He had to do something. If something didn't change, Michael wouldn't make it to the wedding.

"What's up with Michael?" Emmett's voice broke into Justin's thoughts. Emmett and Ted had left them alone while Justin and Brian tried to keep Michael from losing it.

"I don't know. Part of it's Deb. She invited David to the wedding without asking Brian and Michael. Then she had a fight with Brian this morning." Justin looked at Emmett for a long minute.

"What is wrong with Deb these days?" Emmett still hadn't forgiven her for her critique of his taste.

Ted tried to explain their den mother. "She wants Michael's wedding to be perfect. The problem is that she has never known when to back off. And something else is bothering Michael."

"You're right, but he's not talking to me or Brian about it. It must be pretty bad." Justin thought about what Brian had said about Michael keeping secrets and hoped that someone could convince Michael to talk soon.

"Do you think that we should talk to Deb about her behavior?" As the only one of the trio still speaking to Deb, Ted knew the task would fall to him, but he was willing.

"Brian said not to, that this was something that he and Michael needed to settle with her. But, they're going to hibernate for the next two days. I think we should talk to her." Justin knew that if Brian found out about it, he'd be pissed, but he also knew that Deb was stubborn and if she was allowed to stew, it would take longer to get through to her.

Emmett sighed dramatically. "Ok, let's go. Michael and Brian need our help."

Justin smiled at Emmett. He could always be counted on when it mattered. "Lead on Rainbow Warrior."

Emmett blushed at the reminder of his comic book alter ego. The issues of Rage featuring him had just started appearing on shelves and so far, reaction was fabulous. People loved him. This was much better than being a porn star.

The three men climbed into Ted's car and headed for the diner. They knew Deb was working and figured she wouldn't throw them out.

~~~~

Deb was surprised to see Emmett walk into the diner. He had been avoiding her for two weeks now. She smiled thinly and gestured them to a table.

"Hello boys, what can I do for you?" Deb's trademark grin was gone, replaced by anger and sadness.

Ted, Emmett, and Justin exchanged glances, then Ted spoke. "It's what we can do for you. Do you have a minute?"

"Sure. What's up?" Deb slid into the booth next to Ted.

"Deb, we heard about what happened this morning. What's going on with you?"

Defensively, Deb snapped, "Nothing. And it's none of your business anyway."

 

Justin spoke quietly. "Yes it is Deb. Michael is my best friend and I had to help him remember how to breathe this morning. I can not sit by and watch that."

"What happened?" Concern made Deb's voice short.

"There was a problem at the tux shop and he lost it. He needs you to back off Deb. And what the hell were you thinking, inviting David without asking Brian and Michael?" Justin shook his head in amazement that Deb would be so bold.

"I figured that Michael wouldn't mind."

"Well, obviously he does. But he can't do anything about it now. Have you seen his panic attacks?" Justin had to believe that Deb hadn't witnessed one. No one who'd seen Michael struggling to catch his breath would intentionally inflict the kind of stress that triggered one.

"No. They can't be that bad."

"Yes they can. Now look. Emmett and I are willing to forgive you, but you need to talk to Michael and Brian. They love you, but if you don't back off, you're going to lose them both." Justin hoped that he'd gotten through to her. He loved her. She'd taken him in off the streets when his father and Brian had both kicked him out. She'd been there when he needed someone after the Ethan fiasco. The distance that had sprung up between them since she'd started trying to run the wedding hurt him.

Deb looked from Justin to Ted to Emmett. The stern looks on their faces convinced her that she was wrong. Damn. She hated that. "I'll talk to them. I just wanted it to be perfect." Tears started streaming down her face.

"Ah Deb. It will be. Do you think that Michael is going to have anything less then perfect on the day that all his dreams come true?"

"No, I guess you're right."

"Of course we are." Emmett spoke for the first time since he'd walked into the diner. "But you can't tell Brian that we talked to you. They have some things they want to say to you, so you need to listen. But wait until Monday."

"Monday? Why should I wait?"

"Because Brian is hiding Michael from the world until then." Emmett thought that sounded wonderful. He wondered if he could convince Ted to hide from the world. "Michael needs serious downtime. Between the wedding, you, the house, and David, he's getting close to the end of his rope."

Deb flushed. She hadn't meant to run over Brian and Michael, but once again, her big mouth and strong personality caused trouble. Speaking of which. "Justin, I'm sorry. You know I love your work. I was just in a bad mood that day."

"That's ok Deb." Justin leaned across the table and kissed his surrogate mother on the cheek.

"And Em, I need to apologize to you too. I should never have compared you to Anna Nicole Smith."

"I should hope not. That woman's taste is atrocious. But you're forgiven." Emmett's large heart could never hold a grudge.

"Thanks guys. I hope Brian and Michael know what good friends they have. Now, I need to get back to work. You guys want anything?" Deb took their orders and went back to work, much lighter than she'd felt earlier.

Justin and Emmett exchanged amused looks. "Well, that went better than I hoped. Think she'll actually wait until Monday before trying to contact them?"

"Nope." Ted knew she would be over there first thing after she got off work.

"I hope Brian decided to take Michael somewhere no one can find them." Emmett hoped that Michael would be better by the time they crawled out of their hiding place.

~~~~

And that's exactly what they did. After taking Gus to the park, they checked into a hotel. Between the room service and the Jacuzzi in the bathroom, they didn't leave until Monday morning. No one knew where they were, which suited them perfectly. However, they really should have remembered to let Lindsey know how to get in touch with them, because it sure would have saved Michael's sanity from what happened next.

~~~~

Part 3

Brian watched Michael slide open the door to the loft, looking more relaxed than he had been in days. Hiding from the world had helped; Michael hadn't had to deal with anything but Brian.

"Ah, home." Michael walked into the bedroom and placed his bags on the bed, then collapsed beside them. He felt better. The stress of dealing with everything had melted away into nothingness, leaving behind a more settled Michael. "Hey honey. Don't you need to get to work?" Michael hollered from his position on the bed. There was no answer. "Brian?" Michael stood up and walked into the living room. Brian was standing next to the answering machine with look of disbelief etched on his face.

Michael walked up behind him and placed his hand on Brian's back. "What's wrong?"

Brian jumped. He hadn't heard Michael come up behind him. Turning, he tried to hide his feelings from Michael. "Nothing. Just some problems at work."

Michael didn't buy it. "Brian. Truth. What's really going on?"

Brian took a deep breath. "Ok, but I want you to remain calm. Just take deep breaths."

"Something else went wrong?" Michael tried hard to keep his calm. Remembering Ben's lessons on meditation, Michael let his breathing settle into a nice, slow pattern.

"Yes. There was a message from Lindsay, the reception hall called. It seems that they double booked the room. They called and left messages with both parties, whoever got there first with the balance of the rental fee would get it. They called Lindsay when they couldn't get in touch with us."

Michael tried hard to hold on to the peace he'd found in the last two days but his voice was tight as his breathing became irregular. "They wouldn't let Lindsay do it?" He knew that Lindsay would have offered.

"No. They said it had to be one of us." Brian pulled Michael into his arms. "It'll be ok. We'll find someplace else."

"Brian, we've been planning this for six months. Where are we going to find a place that will hold 200 people? And in less than two weeks?" Michael started hyperventilating. "I-I-." Suddenly Michael's throat closed up and he couldn't breathe.

"Mikey. Come on Michael." Brian pushed Michael's head between his knees, but he quickly saw that it was already to late for that. Michael struggled to inhale, but he couldn't get any air. "Fuck!" Brian quickly dialed 911. "Hold on Mikey."

~~~~

"What happened?" Justin walked up to the pacing Brian and placed his hand on his shoulder.

"Michael stopped breathing."

The simple words cut through Justin like a knife. "What?" He quickly sat down before he collapsed.

Brian turned pain filled eyes to Justin. "We got home this morning. Michael was in a good mood, relaxed. He went into the bedroom and I listened to the messages."

"I know about the reception hall. Lindsay called me to see if I knew where you were." Justin remembered calling the hall and arguing with them for an hour about letting someone else come down. They hadn't budged.

"Well, when I told Michael, he went from talking to not being able to breathe in 30 seconds. I called 911 and they gave him a sedative. Once he was out, he started breathing again, but we decided that he should be looked at." Brian's voice shook at the memory of Michael's panic stricken eyes. He knew he'd live with that forever.

"How's he doing now?"

"They haven't said yet." Brian started pacing, and then stopped when he saw the crowd headed his way. Fuck. He didn't have time to deal with Deb right now.

"How's Michael?" Deb stopped a few feet from Brian.

"The doctor hasn't come out yet. But he doesn't need to deal with you right now."

"I know. I just need to say that I'm sorry. I got caught up in the excitement of the wedding and forgot that it wasn't mine."

"Deb, you're forgiven, but the three of us need to sit down and talk." Brian hesitated. What he was going to say next was going to hurt Deb, but Michael was his first priority. "That's why you aren't going to see him."

"What?" Indignation flushed Deb's face.

"He needs as little stress right now as possible. I know you love him, but you can get a little overbearing." Brian moved to stand in front of this amazing woman. "He doesn't have the emotional strength to deal with you."

Deb looked for a minute like she was going to argue, but decided not to. "Ok. But I'm staying here until the doctor says he's going to be ok."

"I didn't think you'd do otherwise." Brian hugged Deb tightly. "Mom, he's going to be ok. Now he has to talk to me."

"Oh honey." Deb knew that Michael's silence was hurting Brian. "You know him; he'll talk when he's ready."

"He'll be ready now if I have to sit on him." Brian snarked.

Whatever Deb had to say in response was lost as the doctor walked up. "Are you Michael Novotny's family?"

"Yes." A chorus answered him.

"I'm Dr. Fisher. Michael is stable, but we're keeping him sedated. Physically, he's fine, no airway obstruction. Does anyone know what happened?"

"It was a panic attack." Brian still couldn't get the image of Michael struggling for air out of his mind.

"What triggered it?"

"Wedding stress."

"Has he seen a doctor?"

"He's seeing Dr. Sullivan for an unrelated matter. Michael said that he could wait until his next appointment, which is tomorrow."

"I wouldn't be too sure that it's unrelated. What's he seeing Dr. Sullivan for?"

"He was sexually assaulted almost a year--." Brian stopped as realization hit him. He turned to look at Justin to find that he'd realized the same thing. "Oh my god. How the fuck could I have forgotten?"

Justin moved to Brian's side and put his arm around his friend's shoulder. "I forgot too. The date didn't seem important."

Dr. Fisher looked from one man to the other. "Is it the anniversary of his assault?"

"No. That's next month. No, it's the anniversary of something else." Brian and Justin exchanged softly sad looks. Friday had been the one year anniversary of their breakup.

"I can't help him if I don't know what the problem is. So would someone please tell me?" Dr. Fisher snapped in annoyance at the two men in front of him.

Justin sighed. "One year ago, Brian and I spilt up. That set in motion a chain of events that led to what happened to him."

"So Friday was his first panic attack?"

"No, he's had a few, but they've gotten worse since Friday. He's been under a lot of stress due to the wedding and there have been some problems." Brian cursed himself for not remembering the date and helping Michael through it.

"Ok. We'll keep him overnight for observation and I'll call Dr. Sullivan." Dr. Fisher looked around at the gathered crowd. Turning to Deb, he said, "You can stay, Mr. Novotny needs his rest. The rest of you can come back later."

"No." Brian's voice was firm. "His mother will be leaving shortly. I'm staying."

"And you would be...?"

"I would be his lover."

"Oh." A surprised and vaguely uncomfortable look crossed Dr. Fisher's face. "I'm sorry, but hospital policy..."

"Fuck hospital policy. And that's bullshit anyway. His mother will give permission if necessary, but I'm not leaving." The harsh look on Brian's face dared Dr. Fisher to argue with him.

Deciding not to deal with Brian, Dr. Fisher gave in. "Fine. You can deal with the doctors upstairs. He'll be in room 421."

Brian watched Dr. Fisher walk away and muttered to himself, "Asshole." He looked around the room at his family. When he saw Ted and Emmett, he snapped at them. "Why the fuck didn't one of you remind me? Especially after seeing Michael at the tux shop?"

"Remind you of what?" Ted exchanged confused looks with his lover.

"That it was your anniversary."

Comprehension dawned on Ted's face. "Because we thought you remembered and just didn't want to be reminded. It wasn't exactly the best night of your life." Ted spoke quietly.

Brian sighed heavily. They were probably right. Under normal circumstances, he wouldn't have wanted to be reminded of the night Justin had left. "Ok. Ted, Emmett, Mom. Why don't you go home? I need to talk to Justin for a few minutes."

Emmett nodded. "Come on Deb, we'll drive you home."

"All right." Deb hugged Brian. "I'm sorry. Call me if you need anything."

"Will do." Brian returned her hug and watched as she left. God he was tired. Why couldn't anything be simple? He loved Michael; Michael loved him. All they wanted to do was promise to spend the rest of their lives together in front of 200 of their friends and family. Was that too much to ask? Apparently so.

"You doing ok?" Justin placed his hand on Brian's arm.

"No. Let's go up to Michael's room. We can talk on the way." Brian walked toward the elevator.

Once inside, they were the only passengers, which suited Justin perfectly. "Brian, talk to me. You can't keep it bottled up inside, not if you are going to help Michael."

"I can still see his face, struggling to breathe. It was like a valve had been shut off. One minute he was talking to me, the next..." Brian couldn't continue. Tears started streaming down his face.

"Brian." Justin pulled his former lover into his arms. "It's ok. You can cry." Justin reached over and hit the emergency stop, then held Brian as he allowed himself to let go. Minutes passed before Brian regained control.

"Thanks sunshine." Brian pulled away from Justin and smiled. "You are a good man."

"I know." Justin reached over and released the emergency stop. "That's what they all say."

Brian laughed to see his arrogance in this blonde body. "I've been a bad influence on you."

"Yes, you have." Justin knew that he wouldn't be half the man he was without Brian. The elevator stopped as they reached their floor.

Walking toward Michael's room, Brian smiled. Dr. Teri Forbes was headed his way. "Dr. Forbes."

"Brian. How are you doing?" Dr. Forbes smiled.

"I'm fine. How's Michael?" Brian knew that Dr. Forbes wouldn't sugar coat the truth and he trusted her more than he trusted that idiot in the emergency room.

"He's sleeping. I'm guessing that telling you to go home and get some rest would be a waste of time." Michael was one of her favorite patients; she was glad he'd found happiness.

"You're right. But Dr. Fisher in the ER tried to tell me I couldn't stay. Said I'd have to deal with the doctors up here."

"Oh really?" Dr. Forbes was familiar with Dr. Fisher's attitudes. "I'll talk to administration about him. Now, Michael's physically ok. There shouldn't be any long term effects from what happened today. Is he still in therapy?"

"Yes. He's got an appointment with Dr. Sullivan tomorrow. Dr. Fisher said he'd call him, but I'd feel better if you would."

"I'll do that right now. Now, Michael needs as little stress as possible. At least until he deals with the underlying causes of his panic attacks."

"I know. That's why his mother isn't here, or the rest of the tribe." Brian caught Dr. Forbes' questioning glance at Justin. "He's only here for a few more minutes. I need to talk to him. He's going to help me reduce Michael's stress level."

"Ok. I'll be back later to check on both of you. Try to keep him calm, and let me know if he has anymore problems." Dr. Forbes began to walk away, then stopped. "You aren't canceling the wedding, are you?"

"No. It would cause Michael even more stress if we tried to plan it again. Still coming?"

"With bells on." With a grin, Dr. Forbes walked away.

"What can I do to help?" Justin turned to Brian. He had to do something.

"Find us someplace to hold the reception, seating for 200, with a kitchen for the catering staff, and a dance floor. Cost is no object. Call Cynthia; see if she can help. I want a new place before Michael leaves the hospital." Brian hoped this was the last of the problems, he didn't know how much more Michael could take. "And here's my credit card; you're still authorized to use it."

"What? You never took me off?" Justin took the card from Brian's hand.

"Never got around to it. No big deal. Now, can you do it?"

"Of course. Don't worry about anything. I'll take care of it."

"Once you find someplace, let me know. I'll have to call the caterer and the band. I'm not sure what do to about informing 200 people of the change." The thought of that many phone calls overwhelmed Brian.

"We can do that at the ceremony. The location for that hasn't changed. I'll draw up a map and make a run to Kinko's."

"Justin, I don't know how I would get through this without you. Thank you."

"That's what a best man is for, isn't it?" Justin blushed at the compliment."

"I think you are going above and beyond what Miss Manners has to say on the subject." Brian knew he was dragging out the conversation, but he needed to gather as much strength from Justin as he could before seeing Michael.

"I don't think she has much to say on the subject of gay weddings either. Now, go see Michael." Justin hugged Brian, giving him what strength he needed.

"God, you've been hanging out with Deb too much, you're getting bossy." Brian laughed nervously.

"I'll take that as a compliment, even though I know that's not how you meant it. Now go." Justin pushed Brian toward Michael's room. Watching Brian walk away, he felt a pang of regret. But he knew that he and Brian would never have taken the step that Brian and Michael were. And he wouldn't be having the wonderful time he was. He wasn't ready to settle down, but someday... Justin walked toward the elevator, trying to come up with a location that would knock Brian and Michael's socks off.

Brian walked into Michael's room, taking in the peaceful sight on the bed. Michael hadn't looked that relaxed in a long time. Even at the hotel, his sleep had been restless. "Ah Mikey. Everything will be fine, I promise." Brian ran his hand over Michael's forehead, then crawled into bed next to him. While Michael slept, Brian thought. He knew that the date was partially the cause of Michael's panic attacks, but something else triggered them.

What else happened Friday? Brian ran through his memories of that day. He'd come home from work, and then Deb had called, telling them that she'd invited... Brian's thoughts trailed off as he remembered. David. It had something to do with David.

Brian knew that he didn't know specifically what had happened in Portland, but he'd thought that it was no big deal. Michael had seemed to get over it quickly, but now Brian figured that Michael had dealt with it in his usual way. He pushed it down and ignored it. Now Brian needed to find a way to make Michael talk to him.

Brian drifted off to sleep, still holding Michael tightly in his arms.

 

Part 4

Brian knew that he didn't know specifically what had happened in Portland, but he'd thought that it was no big deal. Michael had seemed to get over it quickly, but now Brian figured that Michael had dealt with it in his usual way. He pushed it down and ignored it. Now Brian needed to find a way to make Michael talk to him.

Brian drifted off to sleep, still holding Michael tightly in his arms.

~~~

Michael slowly opened his eyes. Where was he? Oh yeah, wedding snafus. Panic attacks. Michael slowly turned his head to find Brian watching him with guarded eyes. "Hi." Michael's voice was quiet. 

"Hi yourself. How are you feeling?" Brian kept his tone light, he knew Michael couldn't handle heavy accusations right now.

"Ok, I think. What happened?"

"You scared 10 years off me. Don't ever do that again."

"It's not like I did it on purpose. It scared the hell out of me too." Michael placed his hand on Brian's cheek. "I'm sorry though."

Brian sighed heavily. "Why didn't you talk to me?"

Michael was surprised by the hurt in Brian's voice. "About what? The stress from the wedding, I did." 

"Not that. I mean about the fact that Friday was the anniversary of the Rage party."

"Why would that date be significant?" Michael racked his brain trying to figure out what happened at the Rage party that Brian would think... Oh. "So, it was the anniversary of the day Justin left. Why would that bother me?"

"Michael, don't play dumb with me. That was the beginning of a trip through hell for you."

"Brian, I honestly didn't remember."

"Well, I think some part of you did. That's one reason why the panic attacks got worse." Brian kept quiet about his suspicions about the other reason. He had to get Michael out of here first.

"Maybe. What did the doctor say?"

"Dr. Forbes said that physically, you're fine. But you need to talk to Dr. Sullivan about the panic attacks. She asked if we were rescheduling the wedding."

"Hell no! I am not going through this again." Michael shuddered at the thought of trying to plan this again.

"Relax. That's what I told her. She's looking forward to coming."

"Good. And you're right. I need to talk to Dr. Sullivan. I'll call and reschedule my appointment."

"No need." Michael turned his head toward the doorway. Dr. Sullivan was standing there, looking slightly annoyed. "Now Michael, why didn't you call me?"

Michael hung his head. "I didn't want to bother you. I knew my appointment was today and I figured I could handle them until then."

"Obviously you were wrong."

"Obviously. Do you want to have our session here?" Michael met Dr. Sullivan's blue eyes.

Dr. Sullivan nodded. "Brian, I'm going to have to ask you to leave."

Brian turned to Michael, who nodded. "Ok. I'll be right outside if you need me." Brian climbed out of the bed, then leaned down and kissed Michael gently. "I love you."

Michael watched Brian leave, halfway tempted to ask him to stay. But he knew that Dr. Sullivan had things to say that he wasn't sure he was ready for Brian to hear.

"Michael, what happened? You've been doing so well that I was about to recommend that we cut back on your sessions." Dr. Sullivan sat down in the visitor's chair.

"Several things. Friday was the anniversary of when Brian and Justin broke up."

"Why would that bother you?"

"That day started a downward spiral that ended up with me in your office. But I think it was that combined with the wedding and my mother." Michael was suddenly overwhelmed with all the stress he'd been dealing with.

"What did your mother do?" Dr. Sullivan was well aware of Deb's overbearing nature. They'd discussed how to deal with her several times.

"She's been trying to take over the wedding, which I was dealing with. But Friday I found out that she invited David to the wedding." Michael finally arrived at the source of the problem.

"Ah. I take it you never told her, or Brian, what happened in Portland?" Dr. Sullivan knew he hadn't, he just wanted Michael to admit it.

"No. When I got back, Brian was busy with Justin. And Ma just kept harping at me. I know I should have told someone, but the time never seemed right." Michael knew he needed to tell Brian, but he just didn't know how.

"You felt abandoned by Brian and smothered by your mother. So you did what you always do; put it in a box and hoped it would go away."

Michael glared at Dr. Sullivan. "You know I hate it when you do that. But you're right."

"Isn't that what you did after the rape? And for the same reasons?" Dr. Sullivan had long seen the pattern in how Michael dealt with stress.

Michael stared at Dr. Sullivan with disquiet. He'd never noticed the parallels before. "I guess."

"And when did you start to deal with the assault?"

"When I told..." Michael stopped. He saw where the doctor was leading and didn't want to go there.

"Michael, you need to tell Brian what happened. And you know it."

"Did I tell you what he was planning on doing to Travis? And he hates David. Always has." Michael didn't want to think about what Brian's reaction would be.

"This isn't about him. Brian's a big boy. He'll deal with what you tell him. But you can't keep it bottled up anymore. If you do, you won't be getting married; you are going to be confined to the psychiatric ward. Is that what you want?" Dr. Sullivan knew that he was playing hardball, but Michael was stubborn. It would take a hard hit to break through the protective shield he'd erected.

"No. I am marrying Brian in less than two weeks. I don't care if we have to do it at the loft." Michael was adamant about that.

"Then tell him. Because the panic attacks are only going to get worse."

Michael sat quietly, thinking about what Dr. Sullivan had said. "You're right. I have to tell him. But I don't know how."

"Just tell him. He loves you. He can help you." Dr. Sullivan stood up. "I'm not going to prescribe any drugs because you won't need them once you tell Brian. He's the best prescription I can give you."

Michael laughed. "As long as I take him at least once a day?"

Dr. Sullivan laughed. "Right. Now, I'll leave you alone with your medicine. Remember what I said."

"I will." Michael watched Dr. Sullivan leave. He felt better having made the decision to tell Brian.

Brian walked through the door seconds after Dr. Sullivan left. "That didn't take long."

Michael smiled as Brian reclaimed his spot on the hospital bed. "No. He just said some things I needed to hear. Brian, there are things I need to tell you."

"About David?"

"How-"

"Michael, I know it wasn't coincidence that your panic attacks started getting worse after you found out that your mother invited him." Brian pulled Michael into his arms, giving him the strength he needed to continue.

"You know me so well." Michael snuggled into Brian's arms, relishing the heat and comfort in the familiar embrace.

"Well enough to know that you're stalling again." Brian shifted to look Michael in the eyes. "You know that I love you, don't you?"

"Of course I do."

"Then why haven't you told me?"

"When I came back, you didn't want to hear about it, remember? I wanted to tell you and all you did was make cracks about me being a doctor's wife."

The pain in Michael's voice made Brian flinch. The early days of Michael's return from Portland were a haze. Although he'd been glad that Michael was back, he'd been worried about Justin. "I'm sorry."

"It wasn't your fault. By the time we'd found our footing again I didn't want to rock the boat."

"And since?"

"I didn't want to think about it." Michael knew that he needed to stop bottling stuff up, but old habits die hard.

"And exactly what did you not want to think about?" Brian spoke gently. He still felt guilty about not paying attention to Michael when he came back. He'd always been a better man in Michael's eyes than he really was.

"It started when I called to tell him about Justin. All he heard was that you had called and you needed me. He ranted that you were a selfish prick who was trying to manipulate me into staying. I finally got him to listen, then he felt guilty. He said he understood that I couldn't leave until we knew what was going on with Justin. And I couldn't leave you alone." 

"No, you couldn't. I never would have survived. I told you that once." Brian couldn't remember much of those days in the hospital waiting room. All he remembered was Michael holding him.

"Yes you did. Anyway, once we knew that Justin was going to be ok, he started asking me when I was coming out. I wasn't sure I still wanted to go. Everyone was a mess, especially you. But David convinced me that you would be ok. So, I headed to Portland. The first two days were great. He took off work and we just spent time together. It was when he went back to work that the problems began." Michael's eyes glazed over as he remembered those painful weeks.

"It started off innocently enough. I'd read about a club in Portland, Fantastica, and I wanted to go dancing. He didn't. So, I went without him. When I got back, he didn't seem bothered, and I wasn't out too late. I just needed to burn off the stress of the last few weeks."

"I understand. So what happened?" Brian knew that David had insecurity problems, so he had an idea where this was going.

"The next morning he asked me if I'd cheated on him. I couldn't believe that he would ask me that. I told him that I'd never do that, and if something had happened, I would have told him. Anyway, he seemed to believe me, and then he went to work. I spent the day looking for a job. When I got home, he was sitting on the couch. He started throwing accusations at me. Wouldn't believe me when I told him that he was wrong. Typical, he didn't want to hear anything that contradicted him."

"David's an ass. Always has been."

"Then you should have left well enough alone. You didn't need to push me off a cliff into David's waiting arms."

Brian stared at Michael in surprise. "You knew why I did it?"

Michael chuckled. "Brian, you have a selfish streak a mile wide. Why else would you hurt the one person who always loved you no matter what? Especially after telling me that you never would have made it without me? I knew. I was just pissed. Justin's interference just gave me an excuse to forgive you."

"You know me too well. And you're right. It was your life. I shouldn't have listened to..."

"My mother. Yes, I even know who pushed you into doing it. Brian, you forget how well I know her. She wanted David and me together, that was all she cared about. She blamed me for the breakup even though he was the one who pushed too hard."

"Ok. So it was because of her that I did it. I just wanted you to be happy." Brian couldn't stand to think about that long week without Michael in his life. It had been the longest week of his life.

"Anyway, do you want to hear the rest of this, or should we rehash your faults?" Michael tried to keep his tone light. He needed to keep distance from what happened in Portland, or he'd never be able to tell Brian about it.

"I have no faults. Please continue." Brian knew that his haughty, arrogant tone would make Michael laugh, and it did.

"Arrogant prick." Michael smiled and continued his story. "He started making rules. He put me on an allowance, gave me a curfew, wanted me to write down every place I'd put in an application so he could check on me. That lasted a few days, then he decided that I didn't need to work. I should just stay home and take care of him. And since I wasn't going anywhere, I didn't need to have keys to the car."

"And you put up with that?" Brian couldn't see Michael allowing David to control him like that.

"I felt alone. You weren't answering my emails or phone calls. I didn't have the money for a plane ticket, and David wasn't about to buy me one. He took my credit card out of my wallet. Then he denied it, saying I must have lost it. And since I was so irresponsible, he wasn't going to give me his." 

"Mikey, why didn't you tell me why you were trying to get in touch with me? I thought you were just going to yell at me, like everyone else." Brian's guilt grew. He'd ignored Michael, again, with disastrous results, again.

"David was reading my email and listening to my phone calls. Then he started working late. Or that's what he said he was doing. He started coming home smelling like the baths. Finally, I'd had enough. I waited until he got home one night and confronted him. God, that was an ugly argument. I told him that I wanted to go home. He said that I never gave him a chance; that I'd been looking for an excuse to get on a plane for Pittsburgh since I'd left. He turned his back on me, like he didn't even want to look at me. I grabbed his arm, trying to turn him around so I could yell at his face." This was the difficult part. "When I grabbed his arm, he pushed me away, a little too hard. I hit the wall."

"I'm gonna fucking kill him." Rage flooded Brian as he jumped from the bed and started pacing. "Why the fuck didn't you tell me?"

"I already answered that. It wasn't that big of a deal. It was an accident, he didn't mean for it to happen. It was the look in his eyes that scared me more than anything. He was so angry that I just sat on the floor. I stopped arguing with him. When he went to sleep that night, I went to swipe his credit card and found mine. I'd stayed because I kept hoping that he would get over his insecurities. But after that, I knew I couldn't stay. When he went to work the next morning, I didn't say anything to him. As soon as he left, I called a mover. There wasn't much of my stuff in the house; David kept most of it in storage. We got all my stuff on a moving van headed home. I called the airline, and a cab. By the time he got home, I was on a plane."

"I hope you put it all on his credit card."

"No, I didn't. I didn't want anything else from him. I grabbed a cab from the airport and went straight to Babylon. I needed to see you. Even though you were high, just seeing you helped me regain a bit of my self. I just pushed everything down and tried to ignore it. When Ma told me that she'd invited David, it all came flooding back."

Brian stopped pacing and sat back down on the bed. He'd known that David was a manipulative, arrogant, controlling son of bitch, but he'd never thought that he'd cross the line into abuse. Pulling Michael into his arms, he kissed him gently on the forehead. "I'm sorry. If I'd known, I would have come and got you. You know that?"

"Yes, I know you would have." Michael felt better; he could feel the tension he'd been carrying for so long ease. "I love you."

"I love you too." Brian could see the stress ease from Michael's face. He looked almost as peaceful as he had when he was asleep. "Feel better?"

"Much. Now, if you don't mind, I'm going to get some sleep." Michael turned so his back was to Brian's chest and pulled Brian's arms tightly around him. 

"I don't mind. Get some rest." Brian settled Michael into his arms and listened as his breathing became deep and even. Michael was asleep. 

David. Just the thought of him enraged Brian. And he was sure he hadn't heard the rest of it. He knew David hadn't let Michael go that easily. He could wait. Brian wondered if David would have the nerve to come to the wedding. If he did show, Brian hoped he would have the good sense to stay out of his way.

That was a hope that would remain unfulfilled.

 

Part 5

 

~~~~

"I don't mind. Get some rest." Brian settled Michael into his arms and listened as his breathing became deep and even. Michael was asleep. 

David. Just the thought of him enraged Brian. And he was sure he hadn't heard the rest of it. He knew David hadn't let Michael go that easily. He could wait. Brian wondered if David would have the nerve to come to the wedding. If he did show, Brian hoped he would have the good sense to stay out of his way.

That was a hope that would remain unfulfilled.

~~~~

Brian was still fuming about David when Michael woke up a few hours later. Pasting a smile on his face, Brian leaned down and kissed Michael's cheek. "Morning Sleeping Beauty."

"Morning Brian." Michael studied Brian eyes. "Stop thinking about David."

"What are you talking about?" Brian tried to play innocent.

"Brian, I know you better than that. You've been lying here thinking about David." Michael smiled indulgently at the man he loved.

"Ok, so I've been thinking about David. What do you expect me to do? Just smile and say that what he did to you is ok?"

"No. But it's over. He realized how wrong he was and apologized." Fuck. Michael swore to himself. He hadn't meant to mention that.

"You've talked to him? When?"

"A few weeks after I got back, he called me. Said that he was sorry for the way he acted and he hadn't meant to hurt me. He wanted to know if I would give him a second chance. I told him that he got his second chance after the baths. Then he made a snide comment about you, said that you would never love me the way I wanted and I was fooling myself if I thought otherwise. That's why..."

"That's why you sent him the announcement. You wanted him to know how wrong he was." Brian wondered if David had truly been sorry, or if he was following the pattern; abuse, apology, abuse. Brian was all too familiar with that cycle.

"Yeah. I know it was childish and petty. But I had to. I wanted him to know that you and I are together."

"I had the same impulse; you just beat me to it. He said something like that to me after your first trip to his cabin." Brian remembered that conversation vividly. He knew that his behavior that weekend had been atrocious, but he'd been jealous. Michael had never been in love with someone other than him and it had thrown him. It had taken him a long time to get over that feeling, if he really ever had.

Whatever Michael had to say to that was interrupted by a quiet knock on the door. Michael smiled at the intruder. "Hey Dr. Forbes. How am I?"

"You tell me. How are you feeling?" Dr. Forbes walked over to the bed, surveying her patient. He looked better, more relaxed.

"I feel much better. I talked to Brian and Dr. Sullivan."

"Good. I'm really tired of seeing you in here because you aren't talking to someone. I don't want to see it again." Dr. Forbes's voice was harsh. 

Michael blushed and looked suitably shamed. "You're right. I won't do it again."

"Ok, if you promise, then I'll let you go home." Dr. Forbes smiled.

"I promise."

"I won't be responsible for my actions if you break that promise."

"Yes ma'am." Michael smiled. He really liked this woman. She cared about her patients as people, not just diseases.

"Ok, I'll sign the papers and you can get out of here. And by the way, I've got your latest tests results. You're still negative." Dr. Forbes walked out the door before Michael could respond.

Brian smiled. "Good news. Now, get dressed so I can take you home to celebrate."

Michael giggled. "Yes sir." Michael slid off the bed and grabbed his clothes. "Wait. I don't want to wear the same clothes."

"Good thing I brought you a change of clothes." Justin's light voice echoed from the doorway.

"Boy Wonder! Aren't you an angel?" Michael grabbed the bag from Justin's hand and headed into the bathroom.

"Perfect timing." Brian smiled at his best man. "How did you know?"

"I knew that Dr. Forbes would be making rounds about now. So, if Michael was going home, it would be soon." Justin sat down on the chair next to the bed. 

"Thank you. So, did you find someplace?" Brian hesitated to ask, because he wasn't sure if he could handle it if the answer was no.

"Sort of." Justin smiled with self-satisfaction. "I found out the name of the other party at the hotel. Turns out that it was a 50th wedding anniversary party with about 30 guests."

"They rented a huge hall for 30 people?"

"Well, it seems that the happy couple wasn't exactly a nice couple. One son they haven't spoken to in 30 years because he's gay; a daughter they disowned when she got pregnant at 17. The only child they have who still speaks to them is an alcoholic daughter with three spoiled brats."

"Lovely family."

"Anyway, I called the person whose name is on the contract, the blushing bride, and offered to buy them out, plus a little extra. Cynthia had a substitute place lined up, a hotel that doesn't get much banquet business because the room is small. I convinced the lady that it would be much better than the huge room they had booked because they wouldn't have so much empty space."

"She bought it?" Brian said hopefully.

"Yup! I have to do a painting of them. Turns out the lady considers herself a patron of the arts and recognized my name. She must not realize that I'm gay." Justin smiled at that. He was still trying to figure out the best way to shock the old bat. "So, everything is on schedule as planned. You're just out a lot of money."

"Thank you. I don't care how much this costs me. I just want Michael to be happy."

"So do I. Did you find out what's been causing the panic attacks?"

"Yes, I did. They got worse when Michael found out that David's coming to the wedding. And there's a very good reason for that." Brian scowled. "You have a new duty as my best man."

"And what would that be?"

"Keeping David away from Michael and me. Especially Michael."

"Are you going to tell me what happened?" Justin hated not knowing what was going on with his best friend.

"That's up to Michael." Brian wanted to tell Justin, but it wasn't his place.

"What's up to me?" Michael came out of the bathroom still drying his hair.

"Telling me about David." Justin grinned at the sight of Michael looking more relaxed.

"Fuck. I really don't want to talk about that right now. How about you come over for dinner, and I'll tell you then?" Michael just wanted to concentrate on Brian for a few hours.

"Sure. Be there at seven. And then I'll tell you about your reception." Justin laughed as Michael lunged at him.

"Do not tease me that way. I'm still under a lot of stress because of this damn wedding." Michael easily got Justin into a headlock. "Now, tell me."

"Ok, ok. God, you are slick." Justin was sneaky though, and started tickling Michael's rib. "Now, let me go."

Michael couldn't talk through the giggles and released Justin so he could catch his breath. "You play dirty Boy Wonder."

"Yes, I do. But I'll still tell you. Your reception is at the same place it was. I convinced the other party to move someplace else. All taken care of by your friendly neighborhood Boy Wonder." Justin bowed dramatically.

"Thank you Justin." Michael walked over and embraced the now blushing young man. "So, have a date for the wedding?"

Justin scowled. "No. You sound as bad as your mother. I'm going to have too much to do to be worrying about entertaining a date."

"Fine, I won't mention it again." Michael smiled and turned to Brian, who'd been watching the whole conversation with amusement. "Let's get out of here."

"Fine by me. Hey Justin, can you give us a ride home?" Brian's jeep was still at the loft; he'd ridden to the hospital in the ambulance.

"Sure. On to the Batmobile."

~~~~

The days rushed by in a haze of activity. Michael's panic attacks were few and far between, usually only flaring up when someone made the mistake of mentioning David. Deb apologized for inviting him, but still didn't know the whole story. Michael was already scared of what Brian and Justin were going to do. He didn't need to worry about his mother too. 

It was now the night before the wedding and Michael was slowly losing his mind. "Ma, that's an old superstition. Brian and I have been through too much to allow anything to ruin it."

"Please? Just indulge me on this." Deb tried her best "Mom" pleading.

Michael sighed. He couldn't say no to his mother when she looked like that. "Ok Ma. I'll spend the night here. Where am I going to sleep though? Justin's in my room."

"He's going to stay with Brian. Keep him company. Help him get ready; keep him from going crazy. You can sleep in your old room."

"Fine. Let me get my stuff from the loft." Michael needed to see Brian one last time before they spent their first, and last, night apart.

"Be back in time for dinner." Deb nagged. "And bring the boys."

"Of course." Michael kissed his mother on the cheek, then headed home.

~~~~

Brian was pacing frantically. "Where is he? He should have been back by now."

Justin laughed. "He'll be here. You know his mother. She's probably talking his ear off."

"I still don't like the idea of us spending the night apart. I haven't slept without him since we got together. I can't sleep without him." Brian kept pacing.

"It's only one night. You'll be fine. I'll be here to keep you company." Justin shook his head in amusement. "You know, if this is how people act when they get married, count me out. I'll just live in sin."

Brian stopped pacing to stare at Justin. Then he started laughing. "Ok. So I've become a stereotypical nervous groom. Can you blame me? I keep waiting for the other shoe to drop."

Justin sighed. "We've taken care of everything. Nothing is going to go wrong."

"What about David?"

"What about him? Several of your larger guests have been alerted. They are going to keep an eye on David, and if it looks like he's going to cause a problem, they have permission to use whatever means necessary to shut him up." Justin smiled at the memory. He'd gone through the guest list and found three guys from Babylon who had been more than happy to insure that nothing went wrong. Michael and Brian's love story was an inspiration to everyone on Liberty Avenue.

"Thank you. I just want this to be perfect. It took me so long to realize that I love Michael. Too long. I almost lost him." Brian's eyes glazed over as he remembered those dark days.

"Brian." Justin shook his former lover. He had to keep Brian from dwelling on the past. "Brian, it's over. You didn't lose him; you came to your senses. You two are deliriously happy and tomorrow, you're going to promise to love him forever in front of 200 of your closest friends and family." Justin hesitated before asking a question he knew would bring up painful memories for Brian. "Speaking of family, have you heard from your mother?"

Brian snorted. "No. Michael insisted that I send her an invitation, but she never responded. If she shows, we'll have a place for her. If not, then I don't care." Brian tried hard to make that true. Deb was his mom; the woman who'd given birth to him was just that.

Justin knew Brian was lying. But it was an old wound that he couldn't help heal. Justin was relieved when he heard the elevator. He was going to miss this place, but he understood why Brian was selling it. "Michael's home."

Brian's mood lifted, as it always did when he knew he was about to see Michael. As soon as Michael walked through the door, Brian pulled him into his arms and kissed him.

Michael responded with passion. He wanted to take as much of Brian as he could to get him through the lonely night to come. Finally, they broke apart and just held each other. Michael giggled when Brian whispered in his ear.

Justin sighed at the sight in front of him. There were times when he was so jealous and this was one of them. He wanted what they had, someday. He was only 20; it wasn't time for him to find the one. But he wanted to find him. "Hey you two. Can you please remember us poor single guys?"

Brian burst out laughing. "Yeah, because we know that you are in a hurry to settle down."

Michael laughed along with Justin and headed for the bedroom to get his clothes. "Hey Bri, Justin, want to have dinner at Ma's?"

"Let's see my choices are; take out, Brian's cooking, or your mom's Baked Ziti. Which would you choose?" Justin called across the loft. His voice echoed in the mostly empty loft. Most of Brian and Michael's things had already been moved to their new house. Justin and the rest of the gang would move everything else while Brian and Michael were gone on their honeymoon.

"Ok." Michael walked out of the bedroom carrying his overnight bag and his tuxedo bag. "Ready?"

"Let's go." Brian grabbed his keys and headed out the door. "Justin, would you drive Michael's car so we can be alone?"

"No. I'm not explaining to Deb why the two of you are so late getting to dinner. I'll ride with Michael."

Brian sighed in resignation. He knew that he wouldn't be able to convince Justin to let him ride with Michael. The kid was stubborn, and scared of Deb. "Fine. I'll see you there." Brian kissed Michael passionately. "I love you."

"Love you too." Michael locked the door behind Brian and Justin and headed for his car. "Ok Boy Wonder, let's go."

~~~~

Dinner was a lighthearted affair. Brian had stopped and picked up a few bottles of wine and kept teasing Justin that since he was underage, he shouldn't have any. Justin just laughed and poured another glass. 

"Mom, please. I can't sleep without him." Brian tried begging Deb. "He'll be here bright and early in the morning."

"No. You aren't going to see each other until tomorrow."

"But what if he has a nightmare?" Brian played dirty.

"If he has a nightmare, I'll call you." Deb pushed Brian toward the door.

"Promise?" Brian broke away from Deb and pulled Michael into his arms.

"Promise. Justin, get him out of here." Deb turned toward the giggling blond.

"Ok Deb." Justin walked over to Brian and Michael and pulled them apart. "Ok you two. That's enough."

"I love you Brian."

"I love you too, Mikey."

Justin managed to get Brian out the door with a relatively little problem considering that he kept breaking away to kiss Michael. Finally, Justin got Brian into the jeep. "I'll see you guys tomorrow."

~~~~

Michael was lying in bed two hours later, trying to find a comfortable position. There wasn't one. He was never going to be able to sleep. A noise from his window startled him, but then he smiled. Walking over to the window, he pushed it open. "Took you long enough. I was beginning to think you weren't able to get away from Justin."

Brian swung one leg through the window, then fell into the room. "That boy is lucky it's too late to change the best man. I finally snuck out while he took a shower. Left him a note threatening great bodily harm if he calls Deb." Brian pulled Michael into his arms. "Now, what shall we do?"

"Sleep. You know how that bed squeaks. If Ma hears it, she'll be in here in a flash. And then you won't live long enough for us to get married." Michael pulled Brian toward the bed.

"Ok. Don't forget to set the alarm so I can get out of here before she wakes up." Brian sat down on the bed and took off his shoes and socks. With a wicked grin, he bounced on the bed, then winced at the loud squeak. "Shit." He stretched out on the bed, waiting impatiently for Michael.

Michael set the alarm, then slid into bed next to Brian. Wrapped around each other, they were asleep in seconds.

They never heard the door open, or Deb's quiet comment. "Little shit." Smiling, she quietly shut the door behind her.

 

Part 6

~~~~

"Ok. Don't forget to set the alarm so I can get out of here before she wakes up." Brian sat down on the bed and took off his shoes and socks. With a wicked grin, he bounced on the bed, then winced at the loud squeak. "Shit." He stretched out on the bed, waiting impatiently for Michael.

Michael set the alarm, then slid into bed next to Brian. Wrapped around each other, they were asleep in seconds.

They never heard the door open, or Deb's quiet comment. "Little shit." Smiling, she quietly shut the door behind her.

~~~~

The day dawned as bright as Michael's mood. Today was the day he'd been dreaming about since he was fourteen. He turned his attention to the man still asleep in his arms. Brian looked beautiful, but then he always did. But in sleep, he looked angelic. Michael smiled at that thought. Brian was far from angelic. He felt Brian begin to stir as the alarm suddenly sounded. The DJ started talking and Michael started giggling. "This is dedicated to Brian and Michael from Justin. Congratulations you two. And Brian, Justin says move your butt or he's calling Deb."

Michael burst out laughing, shaking the bed, when the song started; Going to the Chapel. "Boy Wonder, I'm going to kill you."

"Not if I kill him first." Brian spoke for the first time.

"What woke you up?"

"The radio. And your laughter. Do I really have to get up?" Brian nuzzled Michael's neck, placing small kisses along the pulsing vein.

Michael giggled again. "I think part of you already is." His hand wandered down Brian's body toward that part.

Brian groaned. "You are a very bad man. You know I have to get out of here before your mother comes bursting in."

"I know. But remember where we were. You and I have a date with a hotel room tonight." Michael reluctantly pulled away from Brian and got out of bed.

"Definitely." Brian crawled out of bed slowly, letting Michael enjoy the view.

"How did you get here last night?" Michael leaned against his dresser watching Brian put his shoes on.

"Cab. I had it drop me off at the corner." Brian's cell phone chirped from the pocket of his jacket. Brian didn't even glance at the caller id before answering it, he knew who it was. "Justin, you are a fucking dead man... Yes, I'm on my way home. I'll be there soon." Brian hung up and finished tying his shoes.

Michael glanced at the clock and cursed. "You better get going. Ma will be knocking on the door soon."

"I know. " Brian walked over to Michael and kissed him gently. It was a soft promise of things to come. "I love you."

"I love you too." Michael watched as Brian slid out of the window and down the tree just outside. It was going to be a long day. Shaking himself out of his thoughts, he gathered his stuff and headed for the shower. Emmett should be here soon to help him get ready. Opening the door, he smiled. "Hi Ma." 

"Morning Michael. Sleep well?" Deb smiled.

"Yes Mother." Michael smiled indulgently. She'd kill him if she knew just why he slept so well.

Or maybe not. "Brian leave already?"

Michael tried to play innocent. "What are you talking about? Brian wasn't here."

Deb snorted in disbelief. "Don't lie to me." Laughing, she gently slapped Michael on the back of the head. "I checked on you last night, and guess who I saw curled up next to you? And then I heard the announcer on the oldies station this morning. If Brian wasn't with Justin, then were else would he be?"

"Ok Ma, you caught us. Neither of us could sleep last night. Mad?" Michael gave his mother his best chagrined look; hopefully she'd feel sorry for him and let him off the hook. 

"Of course not. I know you've been under a lot of stress lately. Whatever you needed to get through last night." Deb hugged her son tenderly. 

Michael sighed in frustration. "Then why did you insist that we spend the night apart?" He really didn't understand his mother sometimes.

"Because it's tradition. Just like sneaking out the night before to see your intended. Or having him sneak into your room."

"I love you Ma. Now, I've got to take a shower. Let me know when Emmett gets here." Michael headed for the bathroom just in time to hear a loud voice from downstairs.

"Oh honey! Where are you?" Emmett was here.

"Up here." Deb hollered down the stairs.

Michael shook his head indulgently and walked into the bathroom. When he walked out half an hour later, he could hear his mother and Emmett downstairs laughing in the kitchen.

"What's so funny?" Emmett was sitting at the dining room table drinking a cup of coffee while Deb was making breakfast.

"Hey Michael. Emmett was just telling me about this guy who hit on Justin the other night. Why didn't you tell me about him?" Deb started dishing up scrambled eggs.

"You mean the guy with the dog collar?" Michael shuddered at the memory of the guy who'd wanted to go home with Justin.

"Yeah him. Saw him at Babylon last night. He wanted to know where his 'master' was. Kept panting like a puppy." Emmett turned slightly green at the thought.

Michael poured himself a cup of coffee and sat down. "Em, what do we need to do today?"

"Well honey, I think we just need to get your clothes for the honeymoon." Emmett looked at Michael with expectation. No one knew where Brian and Michael were going. All anyone knew was that they were going to be gone for a month and that in case of an emergency, they were to call Cynthia. Emmett had tried begging Cynthia, but she wasn't telling.

"Nope. No need. All taken care of." Michael smiled. He knew that it was driving Emmett crazy that he didn't know where they were going. Emmett hated secrets. "Ma, I can't eat. I'm too nervous." Deb put a plate of scrambled eggs, bacon, hash browns, and toast in front of her son.

"Eat. You won't make it through the ceremony if you don't eat something." Deb quickly cleaned up the kitchen. "Now, I have a hair appointment so I'll meet you at the church." Kissing Michael on the cheek, Deb left. 

Michael pushed his food around on his plate, not even pretending to eat.

"Honey, your mom's right. You need to eat." Emmett tried to get Michel to at least take a few bites.

"I can't Em. I'm too nervous."

"Why are you nervous? You are marrying the man you've loved since you were fourteen. All your dreams are coming true."

"David. What if he ruins it? And what if something else goes wrong?" Michael stood up and started pacing. "What if..." Michael's breathing became labored and he bent over to put his head between his knees. Emmett quickly moved next to him and started rubbing his back.

"Ok honey, breathe. Take a deep breath." Emmett kept talking until Michael's breathing evened out.

"Thanks Em." Michael sat down as his breath returned. "God. I can't wait until this day is over. I don't think that I can take much more of this." 

"I know sweetie." Emmett sat down next to Michael, concerned about his friend. "Why are you so worried about David?"

Michael studied Emmett. He hadn't told Emmett the entire story about Portland and he wasn't sure that he wanted to. "The break up wasn't exactly as peaceful as I told you. In fact it was pretty nasty. I just don't know why he's coming and I'm scared about what he's up to."

"Honey, he won't cause any trouble. And don't think that you're going to get out of telling me the whole story when you get back."

"Yes Emmett." Michael checked his watch. "Shit. We need to get ready. We've got three hours."

"Let's go."

~~~~

"Where have you been young man?" Justin's voice echoed through the loft. 

"Where do you think I was?" Brian smiled and headed for his bedroom. He needed a shower.

"With Michael. Do you know how worried I was?" Justin couldn't help himself; he had to tease Brian.

"I left a note." Brian smirked at Justin on his way by. "Didn't you enjoy the nice big bed all to yourself, rather than Mikey's twin?"

"Yeah, that was nice. Now, go take a shower. We have stuff to do." Justin walked into the kitchen, scrounging for something to eat. "Damn Brian. Why don't you two go shopping every once in a while?"

Brian laughed. "Sunshine, we're spending the night at a hotel and we're leaving first thing in the morning for a month. Then we're moving out. Why should there be food in the refrigerator?"

"Because I'm hungry. Ok, take a shower, then we'll get some breakfast on the way to the church." Justin threw himself on the couch in disgust. He was starving.

"Fine by me." Brian walked to the bathroom, shedding clothes as he went. Standing under the cascading water, he thought about what he was about to do. Strangely, there were no doubts, no fear. He'd always thought that weddings were for straights and lesbians, and now here he was. Life had some strange twists.

He was still pondering the changes in his life as he shaved and dressed. A year ago, he'd been falling apart after Justin left and Michael was happy with Ben. Now he was with Michael and happier than he'd ever been. 

"Hurry up Brian. I'm hungry." Justin's aggrieved voice broke into Brian's thoughts.

Brian sighed and finished putting his shoes on. "Fine Sunshine. Let me grab my tux and we'll be on our way. Where do you want to go? The diner?"

Brian and Justin walked down to the jeep, laughing at Justin's growling stomach. "I'm a growing boy. I need to eat regularly."

Brian laid the tuxes on the back seat and slid in. "Let's go. We have two and a half hours before the wedding."

~~~~

Michael started pacing frantically. It was now less than two hours before the ceremony and he was slowly losing his mind. The small room at the church seemed to get smaller with every step. "I need to see him."

Emmett sighed dramatically as he finished tying his tie. He couldn't believe that he'd let Brian and Michael talk him into a black tux. At least they'd let him have the color vest he wanted, sparkly purple. "Michael, you'll see him in two hours. Now, calm down."

Michael kept pacing. "I can't."

From the doorway, Deb spoke. "Emmett, let me talk to him." Emmett turned to look at Deb and smiled.

"Honey, you look fabulous." And she did. She was wearing a pale green dress and no wig. Her blond hair was styled in a flattering bob.

"He's right Ma. You look beautiful." Michael couldn't take his eyes off his mother. She looked younger than he'd ever seen her.

"How would you know? You're both gay." Deb ran a practiced eye over both Emmett and Michael. "But you two look gorgeous." She walked over and ran a hand over Emmett's jacket, brushing an imaginary piece of lint.

"Thank you Deb. I'll leave you two alone. I'm sure you have a lovely mother-son moment in mind." Emmett walked out of the room, heading for the room they'd stuck Brian in.

"Michael, you look happy." Debbie walked over to her son and hugged him tightly.

"I am happy. I never thought this day would come." Michael held on to his mother, taking comfort in her familiar embrace.

"I did. You and Brian are soul mates." Deb released Michael and sat down on the couch. Typical, it wasn't even comfortable.

Michael stared at his mother in surprise. "You knew that Brian and I would be together someday?"

"Yes. I remember the day you came home from school bubbling about this new boy. Brian Kinney. I knew you didn't have many friends and I was glad that you seemed to find one. But he was all you talked about for days. 'Brian this and Brian that.' I was beginning to get worried. Then I met him. God, I could tell that boy was trouble. Even at 14 he was too good looking for his own good."

Michael smiled at that. He could still remember those first weeks after he'd met Brian. The fact that this good-looking, smart, popular boy wanted to be his friend had always amazed him. "He was too gorgeous for anybody's good."

Deb laughed. "You're right about that. But I could see his eyes. There was something different when he looked at you. But it took me a long time to realize what I was seeing."

"And what were you seeing?" Michael was curious about what his mother saw in Brian's eyes.

"He looked like a man who'd found the other half of himself. What you two share, what you've always shared, goes beyond love and friendship. I don't know if there is even a word for it. It's like God took one soul and put it in two separate bodies. You aren't complete without each other." Tears sparkled in Deb's eyes as she thought about the love her son had found. 

"Ah Ma. You're going to make me cry." Michael tried to hold back the tears his mother's words had caused. He knew he needed to be strong, or he was never going to make it through the ceremony. "I love you. I couldn't have asked for a better mother. You've always supported me, and been proud of me. I wouldn't be who I am without you."

"Now you're going to make me cry. I love you too. And I know that I haven't always been the mother you wanted, but you've always made me proud to be your mother."

Michael and Deb held on to each other, trying to regain some control. Michael knew that his mother was going to be a basket case by the time this day was over. "Ok Ma, will you do me a favor?"

Deb took a tissue out of her purse and wiped the tears from her eyes. "Sure. What is it?"

"Go find Justin, he's probably with Brian. I need to talk to him." Michael needed to see his best friend before the ceremony.

"I'll get him. It will give me a chance to talk to Brian before he makes an honest man out of you." Laughing, Deb walked out the door and down the hall toward the "groom's room." She was glad that Brian and Michael had found a church willing to perform the ceremony. Knocking, she hollered through the door. "Ok, make yourselves presentable. I'm coming in."

Laughter greeted her words and her appearance as she pushed her way into the room. She stopped suddenly, stunned by the sight that greeted her. "Oh my." Brian stood by the window and the ray of light made him glow. Or was that happiness?

"Well, what do you think?" Brian turned in a slow circle, showing off his assets.

"Wow Brian, you look hot." Deb turned to Justin, who was smiling at his former lover. "And so do you Sunshine." They were both wearing black tuxedos with different vests. Brian's was a dark green, while Justin's was dark red. 

"Thanks. Did you need something?" Justin smiled indulgently as his second mother.

"No, but Michael does."

"What? Is he ok?" Brian bombarded Deb with questions.

"No, he just needs Justin. And I want to talk to you." Deb sent Justin out of the room and turned to the man who loved her son.

"What about?" Brian watched Deb with trepidation. He knew that she supported his relationship with Michael, but things had been a little tense since the David fiasco.

"I just want to tell you how proud I am of you." Deb enjoyed watching the wariness fade from Brian's eyes and be replaced with embarrassment.

"For what? Taking so long to realize what had been standing in front of me for 17 years? For it taking almost losing him for me to finally get a clue? That's nothing to be proud of."

"No, for being a good man. You've changed so much since the first time I met you. It took me a long time to realize that you loved Michael as much as he loved you. Do you know when I figured it out?"

"No, when?"

"When you pushed him away so he'd be happy."

"Yeah, well that was a fucking mistake." Brian couldn't remember Michael's 30th birthday without remembering Michael's words about Portland. He wished he could go back and change things. Michael should never have been hurt like that.

"Michael needed to see where his relationship with David would lead."

Brian knew this wasn't the time to get into a discussion about that. Deb needed to be told about Portland, but not when she was less than an hour from seeing David. She would not take the information calmly. "Maybe. So, that's when you knew that I was in love with Mikey."

"Yeah. I knew you weren't ready for a relationship with him, but I knew you would be." Deb smiled at her second son. He'd changed so much, especially in the last six months. "I love you."

"I love you too, Mom." Brian tightly hugged the woman who'd raised him.

~~~~

Justin walked through the door to the room Michael was in, smiling when he saw what Michael was doing. "You're going to wear a hole in the floor if you don't stop that."

"Boy Wonder. I'm glad to see you." Michael stopped pacing and hugged Justin. He needed the blond boy's strength right now.

"Hey Superman. What's wrong?" Justin held his best friend until Michael managed to gather himself.

"Nerves. I'm worried about David making a scene. Is he here yet?"

"Haven't seen him." Which wasn't a lie. Justin hadn't seen David, but he knew that he was here. One of the men responsible for keeping David in line had stopped him in the hall and informed him of the good doctor's arrival. 

"Justin." Michael's eyes narrowed at Justin in challenge.

"Ok, he's here. But I haven't seen him. One of the 'bouncers' told me that he got here about five minutes ago. So far, he hasn't talked to anyone."

"That's better. Have I told you that you're a good friend?"

"Good? I thought I was your best friend." Justin projected a look of hurt, knowing it would make Michael laugh and relax.

"Fine, you're my best friend. And a royal pain in the ass." Michael walked over to his bag and pulled out a small box. "Here. This is for you."

"You aren't supposed to give me a gift on your wedding day." But that didn't stop Justin from ripping the paper off the box. There was a folded piece of paper inside. "What's this?"

"Open it and see." Michael couldn't wait to see Justin's face when he saw what it was.

"Oh my god!!! When? How? Who?" Justin started bouncing around the room in excitement.

"I got the letter two days ago. As for who and how, that's pretty self-explanatory. Someone at DC Comics got a hold of Rage."

Justin's hand started shaking as the implications hit him. "Rage, national? DC Comics? When do we have to decide?"

"Think about it while I'm gone and then we can talk about it. Oh, and get this. They want to give the Rainbow Warrior his own comic. I called DC to make sure someone wasn't pulling a fast one on me."

"They what?" Emmett's voice echoed from the doorway. He'd walked in just in time to hear Michael's last comment. "They want to give me my own comic book?"

"Yes Em. Rainbow Warrior and Mystic will have their own comic book if we do this." Michael smiled at the look of shock on Emmett's face.

"Teddy too?" A look of pride spread across Emmett's face. Michael and Justin had finally figured out how to make Ted a character. An accountant by day, Mystic was Rainbow Warrior's telepathic sidekick.

"Teddy too. We still don't know if we're going to do it or not. So, don't get your hopes up." Michael knew that he had to keep Emmett's feet on the ground.

"I know. But they like me. They really like me."

Justin laughed. "Ok Sally Field. They like you. Now, what's going on out there?"

"It's time."

 

7

 

~~~~

"Teddy too. We still don't know if we're going to do it or not. So, don't get your hopes up." Michael knew that he had to keep Emmett's feet on the ground.

"I know. But they like me. They really like me."

Justin laughed. "Ok Sally Field. They like you. Now, what's going on out there?"

"It's time."

~~~~

Michael started pacing again. "What? Already?"

Justin laughed. "Already? It's been eighteen years." He walked over to Michael and hugged him. "I'd better see to Brian."

"Thanks Boy Wonder." Michael closed the door behind Justin, needing a minute with Emmett. "Hey Em. How long do we have?"

Emmett laughed. "Well, since we can't start without you, I think we have as long as you want."

"You're right. But I don't want to wait too long." Michael took a deep breath. "Is everything ready?"

Emmett walked over to Michael and put his arm around his shoulder. "Michael, everything's fine. It's going to be beautiful."

"But what about-?" Michael's worry was cut off by Emmett's hand across his mouth.

"Would you quit worrying, please?"

"I can't help it, it's genetic."

"I know. Now, let's get you married." Emmett walked to the door and held a hand out for Michael.

Michael grabbed Emmett's hand and squeezed. "Have I told you lately that I love you?"

"Of course. I love you too, sweetie." Emmett opened the door and gently pulled Michael toward the chapel.

Brian and Justin stood outside the chapel doors. One of them was waiting patiently; the other was pacing frantically.

"Brian, it's ok. He'll be here." Justin watched with amusement as Brian's steps never slowed.

"I know. I'm just impatient."

"Would you stop pacing, please? You are making me dizzy."

Brian stopped and looked at Justin for a minute. "Have I told you how proud I am of you?"

Justin blushed. "For what?"

"You've been a good friend and you're becoming a good man." Brian embraced his former lover.

"It's because of you and Michael. You two are raising me well." Justin had to keep the mood light or he'd burst into tears.

"Yes, we are." Brian chuckled at the reminder of how much younger Justin was.

"Hey Boy Wonder, you aren't trying to steal my boyfriend on our wedding day are you?" Michael's amused voice ended the tender moment.

"Like there's a chance in hell that would happen." Justin pulled away from Brian and smiled at Michael.

Michael's gaze ran up and down Brian's body. "Wow! You look good."

"So do you." Brian walked the few feet to Michael and pulled him into his arms. "I've been waiting all day to do this." He leaned down and kissed Michael passionately.

Emmett and Justin exchanged amused glances, then tried to separate the two men. "That's enough. You have a month long honeymoon where you can do that all day." Justin grabbed Brian's arms.

Emmett grabbed Michael and nodded at Justin. "On the count of three. 1-2-3." Simultaneously, they pulled Michael and Brian apart.

The lovers glared at their best men. "Fuck you." Brian tried to pull Michael back into his arms, but Justin wouldn't release him.

"No. You can wait." Justin was relieved to hear the Wedding March start. "Now, would you two like to get married, or would you rather stay out here and make out?"

"Ok Sunshine. Now, where's Gus?"

"Here he is. Are you sure about this?" Lindsay led a small figure in a black tux toward the group.

"Of course." Brian bent down and hugged his son. "Hey Sonny Boy."

"Daddy. I ready." Wearing a black tux identical to Brian's, Gus was carrying a small white pillow.

"I see that." Michael smiled at the miniature version of the man he loved.

Lindsay shook her head. "I can't believe that you are willing to let him loose on the guests, but that's your prerogative. I'll see you inside." Lindsay kissed Brian and Michael on the cheek and slid inside the doorway.

"Ok, Emmett and I will walk with Gus, then Brian and Michael." Justin's nerves started showing.

"I think we know that." Michael couldn't help but laugh at Justin's stating of the obvious.

"Superman, fuck you." Justin laughed and opened the doors. They'd tried to have Gus walk by himself, but he kept getting distracted by all the flowers and people. So, they'd decided that he would walk between Justin and Emmett.

Brian watched with amusement as his son tried to outrun his escorts, but Emmett's firm hand on Gus's shoulder kept him in place.

"He's definitely your son." Michael teased Brian mercilessly about Gus's need to be the center of attention; a trait he'd inherited from his father.

"Your son too." Brian reached down and took Michael's hand. "Are you ready?"

Michael laughed ruefully. "I've been ready since I was fourteen."

"I know. I'm sorry it took me so long to wise up." Brian didn't know how Michael had stood by and watched while he'd fucked everyone but him. Brian didn't know if he could have done the same thing.

"Don't. It's all in the past. Today is about the future." Michael placed his hand on Brian's cheek. "I love you."

"Me too. Always have." Needing the connection to the past, Brian reverted to his old way of telling Michael that he loved him

"Always will." Michael smiled as he completed the words that had kept them connected through the good times and bad.

Justin, Emmett and Gus had reached the altar. Now everyone turned their heads, waiting impatiently for Brian and Michael. From her place in the front pew, Deb's tears started flowing. She could see them standing in the doorway, then they started walking down the aisle.

Brian's eyes scanned the crowd. She hadn't showed. He didn't know why he'd even looked. His mother had never showed up at any important events in his life, why should his wedding be any different?

Michael felt Brian tense up and squeezed his hand. He knew what was bothering Brian, his mother. Joan Kinney was a cold bitch who didn't deserve Brian's concern, but he knew that Brian would never give up hope that his mother could accept him for who he was. 

Suddenly, they were standing in front of the pastor. His name was John Delaney and he was a regular at Babylon. When he'd heard through the grapevine that The Stud of Babylon and his faithful sidekick had finally fulfilled their destiny, he'd approached them about performing the ceremony.

"Dearly beloved. We are gathered here today to say, it's about time." Pastor Delaney paused as the guests started laughing. "I've known Brian and Michael for about fifteen years now. We were all young fools on Liberty Avenue, but I could see it even then, the love these two share. I just didn't realize how long it would take them to get it right."

Michael only heard about half of what John was saying, he was mesmerized by the adoring look on Brian's face. A look he was sure was mirrored on his face.

"Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today in the sight of this company to witness Brian Kinney and Michael Novotny promise to love each other forever. If anyone knows any reason why these two should not be joined as one, let him speak now or forever keep their mouths shut." Brian and Michael held their breaths anxiously. They'd forgotten about this part.

Not a word was heard and a collective sigh of relief escaped the guests. John continued the ceremony. "Good." He turned to Brian. "Brian, do you take Michael, to be your partner. Will you love him, comfort him, honor and keep him in sickness and in health, and forsaking all others, be faithful to him as long as you both shall live?"

Brian's voice cracked with emotion. "I do."

Smiling, John turned to Michael. "Do you Michael, take Brian, to be your partner? Will you love him, comfort him, honor and keep him in sickness and in health, and forsaking all others, be faithful to him as long as you both shall live?

 

"I do." A single tear slid down Michael's cheek. Next to him, Emmett was bawling.

"Brian and Michael have written their own vows. Brian."

Brian smiled at John in thanks, then turned back to Michael. He released one of Michael's hands and caressed his cheek with it. "I, Brian, take you Michael, to be my partner in life and my one true love. I will cherish our friendship and love you today, tomorrow and forever. I will trust you and honor you. I will laugh with you and cry with you. I will love you faithfully. Through the best and the worst. Through the difficult and the easy. What may come I will always be there. As I have given you my hand to hold, so I give you my life to keep." Brian took a deep breath, then continued. "Michael, you've been my best friend since we were 14. More than half our lives have been spent together. In all that time, you've never given up on me. You've loved me; fought with me; fought for me. You've always loved me, even when I didn't deserve it. When I met you, I was a scared, angry boy trying hard to pretend that I didn't care about anything. But then I walked into Mr. Jeffery's homeroom. Sitting in the back, trying hard to disappear, was my destiny. The person that I was supposed to love forever. You have changed me, made me whole, given me a family." Brian glanced around the crowd at the family Michael had given him. Deb and Emmett were both bawling into their handkerchiefs. Melanie was trying to hold back tears while holding a sobbing Lindsay. And from behind the video camera, Ted sniffled loudly. "Sometimes I'm not sure whether to thank you for the family or not." Giggles greeted Brian's words. "But they are ours." Brian met Michael's eyes again. "I can't promise that I won't make mistakes and that I won't hurt you. But I can promise that I will love you forever and beyond. I promise that you'll never be alone. I promise that I will always be your best friend and lover."

John wiped his eyes. Brian's honest emotion was heartwarming. His love for Michael could be seen shining out of him. John turned to Michael. "Michael."

Michael took a deep breath, trying to get his emotions under control. If he didn't, he'd never get through this. "I, Michael, take you Brian, to be my partner in life and my one true love. I will cherish our friendship and love you today, tomorrow and forever. I will trust you and honor you. I will laugh with you and cry with you. I will love you faithfully. Through the best and the worst. Through the difficult and the easy. What may come I will always be there. As I have given you my hand to hold, so I give you my life to keep." With tears streaming down his face, Michael continued. "Brian, where do I find the words to tell you what you mean to me? When you walked into Mr. Jeffery's class that day, my world changed. I was trying hard to fit in, and not succeeding. I had a few friends, but I had no one to share secrets with. Then, for reasons that I never understood, you decided you wanted to be my friend. Somehow, we bypassed the normal superficial stages of friendship. It was like we'd known each other in a previous life. Maybe we did. All I know is that I looked into those amazing hazel eyes of yours and fell in love. Even when I loved other men, I never stopped loving you." Michael stopped and turned to Emmett, who was holding out a handkerchief. Michael took it with a smile of thanks. Wiping the tears from his eyes, he turned back to Brian, then handed the handkerchief to him. "You've always deserved to be loved. And you are. Not just by me, but by the rest of the family that we've acquired. I promise that I will always protect you, even from yourself. I promise that you will never be alone. I promise that I will always be your best friend and lover."

John's voice cracked as he continued the ceremony. He hoped he found the love these two shared someday, but he doubted it. What they had was rare; mere mortals could only dream of it. "Do you have the rings?" Michael and Brian took their rings from their best men, and handed them to John. "These rings are a symbol of the unbroken circle of love. Love freely given has no beginning and no end, no giver and no receiver for each is the giver and each is the receiver. May these rings always remind you of the vows you have taken." John handed Brian the ring. "Repeat after me. With this ring, I thee wed."

"With this ring, I thee wed." Brian slid the gold band on Michael's finger.

Michael took the ring from John, who was speaking. "Michael, repeat after me. With this ring, I thee wed."

"With this ring, I thee wed." The ring slid easily onto Brian's finger. 

"In so much as these two have promised to spend their lives together and pledged in front of their family and friends, I now pronounce them married. You may seal your union with a kiss."

Brian murmured, "Oh, I plan too." Then he pulled Michael into his arms. The first meeting of their lips was soft, almost a whisper. Michael's tongue darted out and caressed Brian's lips. Brian's hold on Michael tightened and the kiss deepened.

The crowd started cheering and John had to clear his throat twice before Brian and Michael separated. Michael blushed and Brian grinned wolfishly. To the applause of their guests, they walked back out of the chapel.

Giggling, they collapsed in each other's arms while waiting for Emmett and Justin to join them. Michael leaned against Brian's chest, relishing the feel of his partner's body. "Thank god that's over."

Brian leaned down and kissed Michael gently. "No, it's just beginning." They were still kissing when Justin and Emmett joined them.

"Can't you two wait?" Justin walked over to his best friend and pulled him out of Brian's arms. "Come on you two. We have to get you to the reception."

"Sunshine, have I ever told you that you are a pain in the ass?" Brian smirked at Justin in amusement when Justin only grinned.

"Of course you have. That's my job. Now, get moving. The four of us are riding together in the limo."

"Why are you riding with us?" Michael's eyes narrowed suspiciously at Emmett.

"Because, honey, you two will never show up." Emmett threw his arm around Michael's shoulders and started leading him toward the door.

~~~~

Dinner was over and the dancing was about to begin, but first, the speeches. Deb was first up. "I first heard the name Brian Kinney when Michael was fourteen. For days after they met, that was all I heard. Every other word out of his mouth was Brian's name. I knew Michael was gay and I knew he was in love. Like every other mother of a 14 year old, I thought it was puppy love and would be quickly over with. But then I met Brian. I saw Michael's face and knew that it was not puppy love. He'd found the man he'd love forever. Fast forward 17 years; I was right. Michael still loves Brian, and Brian loves him. They'll never want for love. And they are going to be happy forever."

Deb stopped as her tears overwhelmed her. Michael hugged her, allowing her to regain her composure. Now it was Emmett's turn with, Ted standing by his side.

"I remember meeting Michael in the fruit section of the grocery store. He was with Ted and they joined me playing bongos on the melons. I didn't know then that I'd met my future roommate and my lover. I'd heard about Brian Kinney, he was a legend on Liberty Avenue. But I didn't meet him there; I met him at the diner. Michael and Ted had taken me to get something to eat after we'd been kicked out of the market. That's where I met Brian. I don't know what I expected, but it wasn't to see the Stud of Liberty Avenue light up when his best friend walked in. I could see it then. They loved each other. Others tried to come between them; some succeeded for a little bit. But no one could sever the ties that bind these two together. Their love is an inspiration to us all." Now it was Emmett's turn to break down into tears. Ted pulled his lover into his arms. He'd handed the camera to one of the other guests, knowing that Emmett would need him. And he had a few words to say.

"I remember one day, long ago, I told Brian that he needed to let Michael go. I accused him of trying to keep Michael twelve forever. What I didn't understand was that Brian and Michael keep each other young. That ability to love without reservation or fear that most of us outgrow, they never lost. Because they have always had each other. There aren't words to describe their relationship, there never have been. They have always been more than friends, more than lovers. It's like they are two halves of the same person. They aren't whole without each other."

With tears in his eyes, Justin surveyed the damage. There wasn't a dry eye in the house. Michael and Deb were holding each other while Brian held both of them. Ted and Emmett were wrapped in each other's arms. All of them were crying.

Justin stood and walked over to the crying group. "Ok guys. My turn." Heads turned toward Justin, and everyone laughed and sat down. "Unlike everyone else, I didn't see the love when I first met Brian and Michael. I didn't want to. I saw Michael chasing Brian and felt sorry for him. He was waiting for something that was never going to happen. What I didn't see was Brian chasing Michael, until Michael's birthday party. Brian was an absolute mess. That's when I realized that Brian loved Michael too. I tried to tell myself that it was only friendship. I fooled myself for a while. But then the blinders fell from my eyes and I finally saw what everyone else had seen. Brian loved Michael. Someday, I want what they have. Friendship, trust, devotion and above all, love."

Justin stopped talking when the emotion became too much. He needed to remain composed. "Now, I'll open the floor up to anyone who would like to say a few words about Brian and Michael."

From the back of the room, there was a loud, unwelcome voice. "I have a few words to say."

Michael's face paled as the owner of that voice evaded the crowd and moved forward. It was David.

 

8

~~~~

Justin stopped talking when the emotion became too much. He needed to remain composed. "Now, I'll open the floor up to anyone who would like to say a few words about Brian and Michael."

From the back of the room, there was a loud, unwelcome voice. "I have a few words to say."

Michael's face paled as the owner of that voice evaded the crowd and moved forward. It was David.

~~~~

Brian erupted in anger. "What the fuck are you doing here? You saw us get married, now fuck off."

Justin scanned the crowd looking for David's "handlers." Fuck. They were nowhere in sight.

David slowly walked toward the front of the room, shrugging off the attempts to stop him from the few guests knew who he was. He'd rarely gone to the clubs with the gang. With a smirk, David picked up Brian's champagne glass and swallowed the contents. "Now Brian, why would I do that? I just want to add my congratulations."

Brian held tightly to the man in his arms. He could feel Michael's breathing become erratic and labored. "Mikey, it's ok. We'll get him out of here."

David watched Brian's actions with detached amusement. "Oh really. You couldn't get rid of me three years ago, what makes you think you can do it now?"

"In case you didn't notice, Doc, I'm the one Michael married today. Besides, if you had anything to say, you should have said it during the ceremony."

"I tried, but the guy next to me put his hand over my mouth and I couldn't say a word."

Justin smiled. "That's what he was there for."

"You did that? Why? You hate Michael."

Justin moved next to Michael and put his arm around his neck. "David, you've been gone a long time. Michael's my best friend."

"Well, isn't that interesting? Does Michael mind that you're fucking his husband?"

"WHAT!?!?!" A chorus of voices echoed in shock.

Brian left Michael in Justin's care and walked slowly toward David. "You have two seconds to explain yourself. Ah hell, fuck it." With lightening quick reflexes, Brian's fist connected with David's jaw. "That's for Portland, you fucking control freak."

David stared at Brian. "You fucking asshole. Did I strike a nerve?" He couldn't resist taunting Brian.

"No, but I'm going to strike something else if you don't get the fuck out of here." Brian turned away from David, intent on getting back to Michael, who was watching the whole scene with horror. Brian could see the memories of bad times haunting his partner's eyes.

"BRIAN!!!" Michael's scream caused Brian to turn, just in time for David's fist to connect with his cheek.

Justin's arms tightened on Michael as the older man's legs started to collapse under him. "It's ok Superman." Justin's eyes scanned the crowd looking for the bouncers. Ah, there they were, heading for David and Brian. The two enemies were watching each other with unrestrained hatred.

Finally, the three men who had been assigned to watch David appeared at his side. "Sorry Justin, saw him head for the door, thought he was leaving." One guy took each arm and the other shoved David backward, away from the table. "Ok, out with you."

"No, I'm not leaving." David watched Michael. He needed to convince Michael to give him another chance. "Michael, please forgive me. Things will be different this time. I'll move back to Pittsburgh. I won't say anything about your friends."

Michael looked at David with amazement shining through the tears in his eyes. "David, you are getting senile in your old age. After what happened in Portland, I don't even want to be friends with you. Now, get the fuck out of my wedding reception."

Brian smiled as David was escorted out of the room. "And Doc, if you show your face in here again, I'll have you arrested."

Michael smiled as Brian walked toward him. "You ok?" Michael placed his hand on Brian's red cheek; there would be a bruise there later.

"I'm fine. How are you?" Brian looked down into Michael's chocolate eyes and cursed David again. There were shadows in his eyes that he'd thought were gone.

"I'll be ok. Thanks to you. Can I just say that I loved seeing you hit David?" Michael curled into Brian's body, absorbing his strength.

"Anytime babe. Anytime." Brian held Michael for a long minute before they were interrupted.

"What the fuck was that about?" Oh shit. Deb.

"Ma, not now, please?" Michael knew that he had to talk to his mother, but he couldn't deal with it right now. "I'll tell you about it when we get back." Michael moved out of Brian's embrace and hugged his mother.

"Ok. But I want to see you two for dinner the day you get back from wherever you're going." Deb wasn't happy that she wasn't being told where her sons were going to be for a month, but she knew that she had to live with it.

"Thank you, Mom." Brian leaned down and kissed Deb on the cheek.

"Ok. Enough drama. It's time for the dancing." Justin's voice rang out across the room, cutting through the gossip and chatter. He nodded to the band and the slow sounds of Etta James's "At Last" filled the hall. "Michael, Brian. You're up."

Giggling, Brian led Michael to the dance floor. The slow, sensual music hummed along their nerves as they moved in time to the music. Everyone watching could see the love and passion pulsing around them and smiled at the appropriateness of the sweet, soulful words. Sighs of envy could be heard from the crowd.

 

At last My love has come along My lonely days are over And life is like a song. At last The skies above are blue My heart was wrapped up in clover The night I looked at you. I found a dream that I could speak to, A dream that I can call my own. I found a thrill to press my cheek to A thrill that I have never known. Oh, you smiled . . . You smiled and then the spell was cast Now here we are in heaven

For you are mine at last

~~~~~

Tears streamed down Michael's face as he abruptly came back to the present. He looked into the hazel eyes of the man he'd been in love with for so many years and smiled. "I love you."

Gus and Justin exchanged indulgent looks. Brian and Michael did this often. They would look into each other's eyes and get lost. Gus shook his head, then left them to each other. "So, Uncle J, no one heard from David Cameron again?"

Justin laughed. "No. He knew better. After Deb found out what happened in Portland, she called David and threatened him if she ever saw him near Michael again."

"Sounds like Grandma. So, he was still in love with Pop." 

"Does that surprise you?"

"No. He's an amazing man. After all, he lives with Dad. And he's been your best friend for twenty years." Gus said the last loud enough for his fathers to hear, hoping that they would tear themselves away from each other long enough to talk to him.

"Gus, you're not too old for me to put you over my knee." Brian turned his head and glared at his unrepentant son.

Gus only laughed. "You keep threatening that. You haven't done it yet." Gus knew that he was lucky. He was loved, especially by his father. He might have complained about having four parents, three grandparents, plus too many aunts and uncles, but he wouldn't have traded his life for anyone else's.

"So, did we answer all your questions?" Michael turned in Brian's arms so he was leaning against the back of the couch.

"Mostly. But I do have a request." Gus was nervous about asking, especially now that he'd heard how David had hurt Michael.

"What?" Michael placed his hand on Gus's knee, encouraging him to talk.

"I'll understand if you say no, but Hank wants the three of you to come talk to the class. You know, talk about how things have changed since you were our age." A shy, uncertain look crossed Gus's face; a look that they'd seen on his face only once before; the night that he'd stood in front of a houseful of people and introduced them to his girlfriend.

Brian and Justin turned to look at Michael. As the one with the most emotional baggage, it would be up to him. Michael was looking at Gus. "Why all three of us?"

"Well, he wants you and Dad to talk about the changes in the laws regarding marriage. And he wants Uncle J to talk about the hate crimes laws. And he wants to meet the creators of Rage." Gus knew that Justin's bashing was still a sensitive subject, but it was also a main reason he was going into civil rights laws. The travesty of a sentence that Chris Hobbs had received was still grating.

"Ok, I can't speak for Justin and Brian, but I'll do it."

"Are you sure?" Brian didn't know why he was surprised at Michael's decision. After living with him for twenty years, he should have known that Michael wouldn't allow David to keep him from talking about the things he loved.

"I'm sure. David won't be there. And I've missed Hank. He was a good kid. I think I'll give him a copy of Dr. Demon's first appearance in print, autographed of course." Michael couldn't help but smile at the thought of giving Hank a copy of the first comic that the villain inspired by his father had appeared in.

"You are an evil man Michael Novotny." Justin smiled at his best friend. "I'll sign it too." He turned to Gus. "When does he want us to show up?"

Gus smiled. He knew he could count on his family. "Next Wednesday, 3 o'clock. Room 225, Bruckner Hall."

Michael smiled at the reminder of his former lover. Ben had passed away five years ago, finally succumbing to the disease that he'd fought for so long. He'd become a best-selling author writing murder mysteries that sold millions and had been made into highly successful movies. His will had left a great deal of money to Carnegie Mellon, which gave him a building, a lasting memorial to an amazing man. "We'll be there."

 

~~~~

"Will you stop pacing? You're wearing a hole in the carpet." Michael sighed in frustration at his best friend. Justin was slowly driving him insane.

"I know. But I'm nervous. I want you guys to like him. I think he's the one." Justin kept pacing.

"Boy Wonder, if you like him, we'll like him. That's why we're having this dinner party, remember? So we can finally meet the man who tamed Justin Taylor." Michael couldn't help but smile. Justin was being uncharacteristically closed mouthed about his new boyfriend. "You've been dating this guy for six months now, and you still won't tell us anything about him. Or let us meet him. Are you ashamed of us?"

"No. How could you think that?"

"What else am I supposed to think? You're my best friend, and I've barely seen you since you started dating him. You won't bring him over for dinner, you didn't bring him to Gus's birthday party, and you won't even tell us his name." Michael hadn't realized that he was so hurt by Justin's distance lately.

"Oh Superman. I'm sorry. It's just that..." Justin looked up from his pacing and was struck by the pain in Michael's eyes. He walked over and pulled Michael into his arms. "I'm not ashamed of you, or of him. It's just that I didn't want to say anything until I was sure. I didn't want to hurt you."

"Why would I be hurt about your new boyfriend?" Michael pulled back to look Justin in the eyes.

Justin took a deep breath and gathered his courage. Maybe he should tell Michael before everyone started arriving. But he knew that Michael would need Brian. "Brian! Come here."

Brian walked out of the bedroom wearing only his pants. "What is it sunshine? And you've got your arms around my husband again."

"I know. I didn't mean to, but I hurt him."

"How?" Brian's protective nature quickly went on alert.

"Relax. I didn't mean to, but I've been shutting Michael out about my boyfriend. I just wasn't sure how you two would take it."

Michael ran his hand through his hair. "Take what? Spill it."

"Ok. His name is Hank Cameron." Justin waited anxiously for the explosion. It wasn't long in coming.

"You're dating David's son!!! How could you?" Brian's temper was a scary thing, especially when he thought Michael was about to be hurt.

"Do you think I went looking for this? It just happened. Believe me, falling in love with David's son was the last thing I expected. But I did. I love him. He's the one I've been looking for."

"The one what? The one that will allow you to hurt Michael the most?"

"Whoa! Wait a fucking minute Brian." Michael stepped between Brian and Justin, placing a hand on each chest.

Justin kept talking, as though he hadn't heard. "No. The one I'm going to love forever. The one who makes me happy. The one I want to be faithful to." 

Brian heard Justin's words, as well as what he didn't say. Justin had finally found his Michael. "Ah sunshine, you sure know how to take the wind out of my sails. I was enjoying the rant."

Michael had tears in his eyes. "Justin, why didn't you tell me? I wanted to see you fall in love. Give you bad advice."

"You did all that. I was scared that you wouldn't approve, and that it would hurt you. I saw how you reacted when Gus brought up the wedding."

"Justin, that was old business. I'm fine. I just wish you hadn't fallen in love without someone in the family to keep an eye on you." Michael hugged his best friend, genuinely happy that he'd finally found what he'd been searching for.

"Well, I wouldn't say that. There's one member of the family who knows." Justin stared at his feet, shuffling them sheepishly. "Gus knows."

"Gus kept a secret? He keeps secrets like Emmett does. Which is to say, not at all." Brian wasn't sure how he felt about Hank, but he knew he had to support Justin, no matter what.

"He walked into Hank's office one day and he saw us kissing. Then he burst into laughter. He said that he'd been wanting to fix me up with Hank ever since the first day of class. So, I had a member of the family watching out for me."

"Ok, as long as you weren't alone. You ok with this Michael?" Brian turned to his lover, his heart.

"I'm fine. Hank's a good guy. One who will be here soon. So Brian, get dressed." Michael shooed Brian out of the dining room. When he'd gone, he turned back to Justin. "Ok Boy Wonder, spill it. What's going on? There's more to this dinner then us meeting Hank, isn't there? Like why Emmett, Ted, Ma, and the lesbians aren't here. It's just you, Hank, Brian, and me."

"Well, add one more to the list." Justin tried to act like a forty year old man rather than a ten year old boy who'd gotten his hand caught in the cookie jar. "Hank hasn't told his father about us yet."

"Justin, please tell me that you didn't invite David to my home without asking me." Michael couldn't believe that Justin would do that, but from the guilty flush overtaking his face, he had.

"I'm sorry Michael. Hank didn't know his father was coming to town this weekend. David showed up while he was on the phone talking to me about dinner tonight. As soon as David found out that it was dinner with his son's future in laws, he kind of invited himself." Justin hated feeling that he'd let Michael down.

Michael sighed as the doorbell rang. "Sounds like David. Well, I'll just have to uninvite him."

"Uninvite who?" Brian walked into the dining room.

A mischievous spirit moved in Michael. It looked like David was going to be family, god help them all, so they'd have to find a way to make peace with him, but that didn't mean that he couldn't have fun with him first. "Why don 't you answer the door while Justin and I finish with dinner?" Michael kissed Brian softly on the cheek and sent him off.

When Brian was out of sight, Justin started giggling. "Goodie, we can see the front door from here. What's gotten into you anyway?" Justin turned his head so he could keep an eye on the door while talking to Michael.

"It's time to put all this to rest. But Brian's been a good boy; he deserves a new toy."

"Oh dear god, here we go."

From their vantage point in the kitchen, Justin and Michael watched Brian open the front door. He had a welcoming smile on his face that froze when he saw who was standing next to Hank.

*SLAM* "Justin Taylor, get your ass in here NOW!"

 

9

 

~~~~~

A mischievous spirit moved in Michael. It looked like David was going to be family, god help them all, so they'd have to find a way to make peace with him, but that didn't mean that he couldn't have fun with him first. "Why don 't you answer the door while Justin and I finish with dinner?" Michael kissed Brian softly on the cheek and sent him off.

When Brian was out of sight, Justin started giggling. "Goodie, we can see the front door from here. What's gotten into you anyway?" Justin turned his head so he could keep an eye on the door while talking to Michael.

"It's time to put all this to rest. But Brian's been a good boy; he deserves a new toy."

"Oh dear god, here we go."

From their vantage point in the kitchen, Justin and Michael watched Brian open the front door. He had a welcoming smile on his face that froze when he saw who was standing next to Hank.

*SLAM* "Justin Taylor, get your ass in here NOW!"

~~~~

Justin and Michael exchanged amused glances. "I guess Brian's found out about our uninvited guest." Justin giggled as Brian's voice echoed through the house again.

"JUSTIN!!!! I said NOW!"

"I'd better get out there before he comes looking for me." Justin headed toward the living room, then stopped and looked at Michael, begging with his crystal blue eyes.

"Don't worry Boy Wonder. Would Superman leave Jimmy Olsen to face Lex on his own? I'm coming." Michael threw his arm around Justin and walked with him into the living room. What they saw didn't surprise them. It was a Mexican standoff. Brian was on one side of the room; David was standing next to the door. Hank was caught in the middle.

Michael smiled; he could see the thoughts running through David's mind as clearly as if he had telepathy. David thought that Brian was his son's new boyfriend. And Brian was doing nothing to change David's mind. Brian started moving toward Hank with the slow sensuality that had been his trademark, and on his face was a dark, smoldering gaze.

David snapped. "What the fuck are you doing with my son? Michael finally booted your ass out, and now you're chasing my son? How did you meet Hank anyway?"

An evil grin spread across Brian's face. "My son is in his history of gay rights class. Hank asked if we'd be willing to talk to them about the changes we've seen since our wilder days. The rest is history." Brian tried, but he couldn't hold the lecherous look he was sending Hank's way and he burst into laughter.

"Brian, you are an evil man." Justin's voice broke the tension as he walked across the room and put his arm around Hank's shoulder. A quick look of relief flooded David's face until he realized what that meant. His head spun back around until he saw Michael standing in the doorway. Justin kept talking. "David, I'm Hank's boyfriend, not Brian. You really should have known better than that. Like he'd ever leave Michael."

Michael walked into the room and stood next to Brian, who was still laughing. "Did you enjoy yourself?"

Brian looked down into the smiling face of his lover, searching his eyes for any trace of uneasiness with David's presence. He found nothing but love. "Oh, that was fun. Now, what the fuck is David doing here?"

"Hank is his son and he wanted to meet his new boyfriend." Michael knew that Brian was worried about him, but it was past time forgive and forget. "Just like you would want to meet Gus's new girlfriend." Oh shit. He'd promised not to say anything. Maybe Brian wouldn't notice his slip.

Yeah right. "Gus has a new girlfriend? Why doesn't anyone tell me anything?"

Michael could only smile at the indigent tone in Brian's voice. "Babe, we'll discuss Gus's love life later. Right now, we have to deal with our other child."

Across the room, Justin snorted. "Please. You two have been done raising me for a long time. I'm all grown up now."

Next to him, Hank laughed. "Definitely all grown up." He had met Brian and Michael briefly the day they'd come to speak to his class. Even then, he'd been struck by the love that flowed between them and around them. It was a tidal wave that swept everyone into it and never turned them loose.

"What the fuck is going on here?" David's cold voice shattered the illusion that putting the past behind them was going to be easy.

Sighing, Michael played the good host. "David, please have a seat. Would you like a drink?" Michael gestured to the couch and walked over to the liquor cabinet. He poured drinks for Brian and Justin. "Hank?"

David sat down with great reluctance. He did not want to be comfortable here. But he was. He could see that this was a home, full of love and laughter. Framed pictures of family fought for space with action figures on the fireplace mantle and the walls were lined with more pictures as well as artwork by Justin. "Whiskey."

Hank and Justin sat side by side on the loveseat. Hank shyly requested a beer. He knew that it would take time for him to be comfortable around Justin's family. Brian also intimidated him. Brian Kinney was still a legend twenty years after abdicating his throne as the Stud of Liberty Avenue; and he'd been Justin's first lover.

Handing Hank his beer, Michael whispered softly in his ear. "Hank, relax. Everything will be fine." He was rewarded with a more confident smile.

Sitting down on the arm of Brian's chair, Michael sipped his drink. The tension started to rise again as Michael took a minute to observe David. Even at sixty, the man was still gorgeous. Washboard abs proved that he still took care of his body, and his gray hair added class and distinction.

"Ok, who goes first?" Brian reached up and held Michael's hand. He needed the reassurance as well as the connection to keep from hitting David. Because he knew that David would not get through this night without saying something to piss him off.

"How long have you two been seeing each other?" David's tone was biting and slightly sarcastic.

"Six months." Hank grabbed Justin's hand and held on for dear life.

"And how did you meet my son?" David turned an accusing eye on Justin. "Did you know who he was?"

"Yes, David. I knew that Hank was your son. Gus is in his History of Gay Rights class. One day, Gus came home and started asking questions. It seemed that Hank had figured out who Gus was and asked him to see if we would be willing to talk to his class. We all agreed."

Brian tensed as he remembered that David had been pumping Hank for information about Michael. "You knew that Gus was in Hank's class, because you were asking Hank questions about Michael." Michael squeezed Brian's hand in warning.

"Yes I did. I care a great deal about Michael and I wondered if he was happy."

"You mean, you wanted to know if we were still together, so you would know if you could stand a chance to get him back. God, your senility is amazing." Brian moved, as if to stand up, but Michael pushed him back down by the shoulder.

"Brian, this isn't about us." Michael reminded his lover just why David Cameron was sitting in their living room, drinking their whiskey. "This is about Hank and Justin." And something that he knew he should have told Brian long ago. He could only hope that Brian would understand.

"No, this is about me. David is going to have difficulty accepting Justin and Hank because of me. I think we need to talk about the past." Brian looked over at the two lovebirds. "Justin, why don't you and Hank run to the liquor store?"

Hank shook his head. "No, I want to stay. This effects me too."

Justin tightened his hold on his lover. "I'm not sure that's a good idea." He turned to look at David. "David, does Hank know the whole story about Portland?"

"Yes he does." The sadness in David's eyes told the story of how difficult that had been.

"Ok, then we'll stay." Justin sat back against the couch, pulling Hank with him. Their participation in this conversation would be limited to observing. Unless it got out of hand, then Justin would be keeping Brian from killing the father of the man he loved.

David was the first to break the strained silence that fell over the group. "I'm sorry about the scene I caused at the wedding."

"You should be. Michael was a wreck from the time he found out you were coming. Why didn't you take the hint, we didn't want you there?" Brian's grip on Michael's hand got tighter as he remembered Michael's panic attacks.

"I called Deb to find out if the announcement was real, or a fake. When I found out that it was real, I finessed her into telling me the details and inviting me."

"Why would I fake something like that? Especially considering how easy it would be for you to find out the truth?" Michael squeezed Brian's hand and cursed. He could feel his heart rate start to increase. David always had this effect on him.

"I don't know. Why did you send it to me in the first place?"

"We sent it because you were wrong, and we wanted you to know it. I finally woke up and realized that Michael was the only man I'd ever really loved."

"Why's Justin still hanging around here? He's not waiting like Michael waited is he?" David knew that he'd piss everyone off with that question, but he didn't want his son getting hurt.

Justin laughed, almost hysterically. "Several things, David. One, I haven't loved Brian for a long time. Two, I'm the one who made him realize how he truly felt about Michael; three, Michael is my best friend. And four, in case you haven't realized it, Brian and Michael love each other. There is no force, earthly or otherwise, that will ever come between them. The past twenty years has only made the bond they've always shared that much stronger."

Michael beamed at Justin. "Thank you Boy Wonder."

"Hey, just telling the truth. Now David, back to your behavior at the wedding. Would you care to explain the remark you made about Brian and me?" Justin had been curious about that ever since they'd told Gus the real story of the wedding.

"What remark?" David looked from Brian to Michael and saw what Justin had been talking about. It wasn't that they were holding hands, it was that when ever they weren't touching, it only took seconds before a hand reached out to caress the first body part it came in contact with.

Brian jogged David's memory. "You asked Justin if Michael minded that he was fucking his husband."

"I saw the two of you, two days before the wedding. You were headed toward the backroom with your arms around each other, kissing." David glared at Brian.

Brian and Justin exchanged confused glances, and then Brian remembered what David had seen. "Doc, you really should get your eyes checked. That wasn't me. I have a cousin who looks like me. Of course Justin was attracted to him. In fact..." Brian turned his head to scan the family pictures, then pointed to it. "There's a picture of the two of us at the wedding."

David stood up and walked toward the pictures. There it was. A picture of Brian with a man about his age who looked enough like him to confuse anyone who only caught a glimpse. "Sorry. I was just concerned about Michael."

"How can you say that you care about Michael and then treat him the way you did in Portland?" Brian finally brought up the true reason he hated David.

David had the courtesy to flush at the reminder of his bad behavior. "There is no excuse for what I did. I never should have hit Michael."

Fuck. Michael cringed and looked at Brian with apprehension. Double fuck. Anger turned Brian's hazel eyes dark.

"Michael." Brian's voice was low with accusation. "Did you lie to me?"

"You never asked. I just left out part of the truth. I knew that if I told you, we wouldn't be getting married because you'd be in jail for killing David."

"Mikey," Michael smiled, he was forgiven. "I want the entire story this time."

"Ok, what I told you was true, except for a few details. The shove into the wall happened during the argument about me going dancing without him, before I found out he was going to the baths. Then I found out about the cheating." Michael's eyes clouded as he thought back to the second worst day of his life.

 

~~~~~

Flashback

Michael paced the floor impatiently. Where the fuck was David? It was 10:30 and David had called three hours earlier saying that he'd been held up at a business function. *Business function my ass. Does he really think I'm that naive? * Michael felt alone. David was out all the time, and Brian wasn't answering any of his phone calls or emails. It had been two weeks since the fight that had ended with Michael thrown into the wall, and things were only getting worse. David was rarely home, and when he was, he had a new list of rules for Michael to follow. Any argument ended physically, and they hadn't had sex in days.

Michael stopped pacing when he heard David's key in the lock. Michael sat down on the couch, pretending to be reading a book. He looked up when David walked into the living room "Hey David. Did you get all your business taken care of?"

"Not really." David sat down next to Michael and Michael swore violently to himself. He could smell the scent of sex and smoke hanging on David like a cloak. He'd been to the baths, again.

David tried to hug Michael, but the younger man stood up. "David, we need to talk."

"What's up?"

Michael treaded carefully; he didn't want David to get defensive. "Where were you tonight?"

"I told you, I had some business that ran late."

Moving out of arms reach, Michael asked the question he already knew the answer to. "And what kind of business did you have at the baths? Somebody twist their back out of shape fucking?"

David's voice was cold and harsh, the way it always was when Michael questioned his actions. "What makes you think I was at the baths?"

"David, regardless of what you might think, I'm not stupid. I can smell you from across the room. You reek of sex and other men's colognes." Michael had thought that David had hurt him as much as he could, but he was wrong. Once again, he wasn't enough for David, he didn't believe that Michael loved him. "Feeling insecure again?"

"Michael, I don't know what you're talking about." David tried to bluff his way out.

"Fuck you David. I'm not falling for this. So, how many men did you fuck? Was it enough to make you feel young again?" Michael knew he was pushing his luck, but he had been friends with Brian for too long to allow this to continue. He'd learned many things from his best friend, not the least of which was when to stand up for himself.

"Michael, I didn't fuck anyone."

"I don't believe you, and what's more, I don't care."

In an instant, David turned vicious. "You don't care that you can't satisfy me and I have to look elsewhere?"

Usually, Michael would have absorbed the blow, but this time, he'd had enough. "Please, the entire 7th fleet couldn't satisfy your insecurities. And you call Brian a slut."

"And how is he? Heard from him lately?" David started moving toward Michael.

"None of your business." Michael edged away from David; he had that look in his eyes again.

"Oh, but everything you do is my business, Michael. Now, tell me what you did today."

"Same thing I do every day. Played the perfect little housewife. I even made you dinner before you decided that getting some hot young guys to fuck you was more important than coming home to me."

"Did you see anyone?"

"You mean besides the pool boy? Nope." Michael smiled at the memory of the hot young body in tight shorts.

"The pool boy was here?" David swore silently. Was today the day that the pool boy came? He always made it a point to be home when he was here.

"I forgot to tell you, he's got a final exam tomorrow. He called yesterday and arranged to come today instead." Michael had purposefully forgotten to tell David about the change. He'd been eyeing Marco for weeks; David's latest forays into the bathhouses of Portland had made up his mind.

"Really, you forgot to tell me?" Disbelief was etched in every word David spoke.

"You know, Marco's pretty hot. Fabulous fuck too." Michael braced himself for what he knew was coming. And David didn't disappoint.

"You fucking slut!" David moved quicker than Michael did and he backhanded the younger man across his cheek.

"Look who's talking. Who was the first one to be buried in Marco's tight firm ass? Wasn't me." Michael hadn't been at all surprised when Marco mentioned that he'd fucked David while Michael was still in Pittsburgh. Michael made the mistake of looking away from David, only for a second, but it was long enough. David grabbed his arm and pulled.

"What I did while you refused to leave Brian is none of your business." David pushed Michael backwards, pinning him to the wall. "Now, who else has had their cock up your tight little ass? The next door neighbor? The mailman? The pizza delivery boy?"

Michael knew that struggling would do no good, David was much stronger than he was. But he did have a weapon that David didn't. David was still jealous, Michael couldn't care less. "Wouldn't you like to know? Maybe the pizza boy and I finished up one afternoon just before you got home and fucked me. Maybe I finished blowing the mailman, swallowed his delicious cum, and then kissed you. Does that turn you on?" Michael could feel every inch of David's body pressed against his, and he knew the reaction his words were causing.

"Maybe I should remind you who you belong to." David kissed Michael. It was a hard, punishing kiss. Michael waited until David relaxed his guard, then raised his leg along the inside of David's thigh. "You fucking asshole." David's breath left his body as Michael's knee found its target.

"David, take a shower and go to bed. I'm sleeping on the couch." Michael walked away from David's still recovering body.

Michael lay on the couch staring at the ceiling. He knew that he wasn't going to get to sleep, but what he didn't know was that the long night was far from over.

 

10

 

~~~~~

Michael knew that struggling would do no good, David was much stronger than he was. But he did have a weapon that David didn't. David was still jealous and Michael couldn't care less. "Wouldn't you like to know? Maybe the pizza boy and I finished up one afternoon just before you got home and fucked me. Maybe I finished blowing the mailman, swallowed his delicious cum, and then kissed you. Does that turn you on?" Michael could feel every inch of David's body pressed against his, and he knew the reaction his words were causing.

"Maybe I should remind you who you belong to." David kissed Michael. It was a hard, punishing kiss. Michael waited until David relaxed his guard, then raised his leg along the inside of David's thigh. "You fucking asshole." David's breath left his body as Michael's knee found its target.

"David, take a shower and go to bed. I'm sleeping on the couch." Michael walked away from David's still recovering body.

Michael lay on the couch staring at the ceiling. He knew that he wasn't going to get to sleep, but what he didn't know was that the long night was far from over.

~~~~

Michael stared at the ceiling wondering how the hell he'd gotten into this mess and how he was going to get out of it. Suddenly, he was pushed from the couch onto the floor.

"Wake up Michael." Fuck. David was drunk, again. That didn't bode well.

"Fuck you David, I am awake." Michael struggled to stand up. It would not do to be caught in a vulnerable position right now.

"Were you lying to me? Huh? Did you really fuck the pool boy?" David's words were slightly slurred and Michael could smell the whiskey.

"Yes I did. Want me to tell you all about it? How it felt to have my cock inside his tight, firm ass? Hmm, is that what you want to know?" Michael stood firm not two feet in front of David. "How it felt to have him buried deep inside of me?"

Michael knew that he was pushing David, but he couldn't stop. He'd put up with David's bullshit for far too long. Brian had taught him to go for the jugular and that's exactly what he was going to do.

But David had more experience. And Michael had a much bigger target. "Michael, you really are pathetic. Do you really think Marco wanted you? You can't even get the biggest slut in Pittsburgh to fuck you. And he never will."

Michael closed his eyes against the pain that David's words caused. He hated it that even after all this time; the realization that Brian didn't want him could still hurt. But David wasn't through.

"He doesn't even care that you're gone, does he? He hasn't bothered to call you since you got here, has he?" David moved closer to Michael, confidant that he had quelled Michael's spirit.

"Fuck off." Michael's voice was small and quiet. Even more painful than the fact that Brian didn't want him was the fact that Brian didn't seem to even miss him. David smirked at the look of devastation and pain in Michael's eyes.

"Now Michael, what am I going to do with you? You broke the rules, and you deserve to be punished." David was now inches from Michael but still hadn't touched him.

Something inside Michael snapped. He was not going to allow David to punish him like a child, like he was Hank. But he knew that he had to be careful. A drunk, enraged David was not someone to underestimate. Cautiously, he backed up a step and put his hand on David's chest. With one quick move, he pushed David backward and moved out of range. David stumbled back a few steps, but remained on his feet.

"Fuck you!!! I am not a child to be controlled, I'm supposed to be your partner. Someone you trust. But you don't know the meaning of the word. If you ever touch me again, I'll kill you." Michael wasn't naive enough to believe that David would listen, but he had to say it.

He was right; David didn't seem to have heard a word Michael said. "Now Michael, that wasn't nice. You aren't playing by the rules. You don't touch me."

"David, go to hell. I knew I should have listened to Brian." Michael never saw the fist until it connected with his jaw.

"What have I told you about mentioning that name in my house?"

Michael couldn't hear anything over the ringing in his ears.

 

~~~~

Michael stopped talking when he felt Brian leap to his feet. Before Justin or Michael could react, Brian had David pinned to the living room wall. "You fucking bastard. I ought to kill you right now. How dare you lay a hand on Michael? The only thing he ever did wrong was love you."

David stood quietly, letting Brian's rage roll over him.

Justin turned to his lover and was surprised to see the tears in his shell-shocked eyes. "I thought he told you everything?"

Hank leaned into Justin's arms, finding the same strength that Michael had so many years earlier. "He did. But it's different hearing it from Michael."

"Brian, don't." Michael placed his hand on Brian's arm. He wasn't surprised that a film of anger clouded the hazel eyes he loved so much.

"Why didn't you tell me?" The betrayal and hurt in Brian's voice was overwhelming.

"Travis."

Brian was startled to hear that name again. "What does that asshole have to do with David?"

Michael shook his head. "Brian, I knew what you and the guys were planning for him. And I knew that David was coming to the wedding. There was no way to stop him. What would you, Justin, Emmett, and Ted done if you'd known?"

Brian looked over to the loveseat where Justin held his lover. Justin's blue eyes were filled with the same rage that Brian could feel crawling under his skin. "Ok, I understand why you didn't tell me before the wedding. But why not after? You've been sleeping beside me for twenty years. I thought we were supposed to share everything." Brian released David, allowing him to slide down to the floor.

Michael placed his hand on Brian's cheek where a single tear fell. "I'm sorry honey. I didn't want to bring it up during the honeymoon. I had enough to deal with, the anniversary of something much worse for one. Then when we finally got back, I actually forgot about him. David ceased being important the day I married you."

Brian scowled at the memory of their honeymoon. The length and dates had been planned to cover the anniversary of Michael's assault. Brian didn't want him near Pittsburgh on that dark day. But even in their getaway, the memories had threatened to drown Michael. "You still should have told me."

"I know. Forgive me?" Michael's chocolate eyes were filled with thirty-eight years of memories and love.

Brian smiled, the same love reflected in his eyes. He gently pulled his lover, his partner, his life, into his arms. "Of course I do. Is there anything else you haven't told me?"

Michael curled into Brian's arms. "No, but there is more to the story."

"Do I want you to finish it?"

"Probably not, but I need to." Michael's eyes begged for patience and understanding from Brian.

"Ok. I'll try not to kill David until after you're done. But I'm not making any promises." Brian turned his head back to David, who'd moved back to his chair.

"That's all I ask." Michael pulled Brian's head down and touched their foreheads together. Brian smiled, then kissed Michael gently.

"Let's sit back down." Brian led Michael back to the chair they'd been sitting on. Only this time, after he sat down, he pulled Michael onto his lap.

As Justin watched Brian and Michael make up, the tightness in his chest eased. He always reacted that way when they fought. It was rare, but it always scared him when it happened. He had to believe that their love could conquer anything, even David.

Hank watched the group with increasing unease. He'd underestimated the hatred between Brian and his father. Growing up, the name Brian Kinney was a curse. His father routinely blamed Brian for the failure of his relationship with Michael. It was only in the past three years that David had told him the truth and begun to take responsibility for his actions. Would they be able to put that behind them? Or would he be forced to choose between his lover and his father?

Justin watched the play of emotions cross Hank's face. "Babe, it will be ok." Justin whispered as he ran his hand through his lover's light brown hair.

"How can you say that? Brian hates my father and Dad's not too fond of him either. I don't want to have to choose."

"Whoa, who said anything about making you choose? Michael grew up without a father; he would never come between you two. And he can keep Brian in line." Justin tightened his embrace, hoping that his words weren't a lie.

David knew that he should try to explain, but he also knew that Michael needed to finish.

Michael watched the room from his position on Brian's lap. He wasn't going to complain about that because it allowed him to keep Brian under control. Brian couldn't go after David again without dumping him on the floor. "Let me finish. David had just punched me, and I couldn't hear anything over the roaring of blood in my ears."

~~~~

Michael stared at David in shock. Even after the backhanded slap; even after all the shaking; and even after being shoved into the wall, he couldn't believe that David had actually punched him. Now he was disoriented and was having a hard time concentrating, which David took full advantage of.

Grabbing Michael's arm, David started dragging him across the room, toward the bedroom. But then he stopped in the middle of the living room floor. "Michael, why do you make me do these things?"

Michael shook his head to try and clear the cobwebs that seemed to have sprung up in seconds. He needed to be alert. David took his head shaking to be a rebuttal of his words.

"It's all your fault. If you would just remember the rules, we wouldn't be having any problems." David released Michael's arms, then embraced him. "I love you."

Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Michael knew what David wanted now. Could he do it? Could he fake the passion necessary to lull David into complacency? He had to get out of here before David destroyed him. But if he continued fighting, David would become paranoid, barely sleeping, and always alert. He would never give Michael the opportunity to escape.

A sick feeling gnawed at Michael's gut as he leaned into David's arms and something inside him died. He had no choice if he ever wanted to see Pittsburgh again. David took Michael's actions the way he was meant to and gently guided Michael toward the bedroom. All the while, Michael repeated one phrase in his head, over, and over. "There's no place like home."

Hours later, David finally slept and Michael slid out of bed. Moving slowly, he looked for David's discarded jeans. Quietly, he removed the wallet and headed for the bathroom. He had to take a shower; he couldn't stand the scent of what he'd done. Plus the sound of the running water would disguise what he was doing. Michael started the water, then opened David's wallet. He supposed that what he was about to do could be considered theft, but unless David had called the bank, Michael was still authorized to use his credit card.

What the hell is this? Michael swore furiously. Looking through David's credit cards, Michael had discovered his own. *It wasn't lost, the asshole swiped it. * Michael silently debated with himself. Should he use David's card, a final insult, or should his independence begin now? A small spark of self-respect flared in Michael's heart and he knew the answer. He had to be a grown up. And he didn't want to owe David anything.

After taking his shower and drying off, Michael headed for the bedroom. He quietly replaced David's wallet and slid under the covers. As Michael drifted off to sleep, he could only think of one thing, he'd be home tomorrow.

~~~~

Michael turned and looked onto Brian's eyes. "And you know the rest. David thought I was suitably under control and left for work the next morning. As soon as he left, I called the moving company and the airline. When David got home, I was gone. Didn't even leave him a note."

Brian smirked at David, then turned his attention back to the man in his lap. "Baby." His arms tightened around Michael's shaking body. "It's ok. I understand." Brian remembered Michael's frantic sexual activity in the weeks after his return from Portland. Now he finally understood the full reason behind it. He had been trying to fill the emptiness that accompanied the realization that he'd used his body to get what he needed. It had taken Ben to break through that shell. Brian sent up a silent thank you to the Professor.

Michael drew strength from Brian, as always. He was ok, he had been for a while, but the telling of the story had caused all the old feelings of shame to come flooding back. "I'm actually ok. I got out. If I'd stayed any longer, I wouldn't have."

"I love you." Brian had lost count of the number of times he was amazed by the strength Michael possessed.

"I love you too."

"Good, now, I need to talk to David." Brian shifted Michael's weight so he could stand up.

"Brian, you promised that you wouldn't kill him." Michael stood up and put his hand on Brian's arm.

"No, I promised that I wouldn't kill him until you finished. Now you are done, and he's a dead man." The quiet calm of Brian's voice was scarier than a full shout would have been.

"Brian, you can't." Michael had to keep Brian from doing something that he wouldn't regret.

"Why not? You aren't sticking up for him, are you?" Brian stared at Michael in disbelief. He couldn't imagine why Michael would be trying to stop him from exacting revenge.

"Justin." Michael pulled out the big guns, the ammunition for which Brian had no defense.

Brian turned his head toward the blond sitting on the loveseat watching the action with apprehension. "Fuck, Mikey. I want to hurt the Doc badly."

"I know. But you can't do that to Justin. He loves Hank. And Hank loves him. If you do this, you'll destroy their relationship." Michael kept his voice low. "I won't ask Hank to choose between Justin and his father."

"How can I spend time around him? He hurt you." Brian ran his hand across Michael's cheek. He could almost see the bruise from David's punch.

"Yes he did. But he told Hank about it. That's a hard thing for a father to do, remember?" Michael gently reminded Brian of the pain that explaining his failings to Gus had caused.

"I remember. Ok, I won't touch him." Brian resigned himself to having to put up with David. He could do nothing that would hurt Justin, the younger man was far too important to him for that.

Across the room, David felt the tension ease slightly. Michael had gotten through to Brian. Now it was up to him to try and explain his actions. There were no excuses, but there were reasons. Reasons that it had taken him fifteen years to understand. "Brian, Michael, I would like to try to tell you why. If you want to hear it."

Brian looked completely uninterested in anything David had to say, but he knew that Michael needed to hear David explain why he'd hurt him, and not just the physical violence.

Michael sat down on the arm of chair, the same spot he'd started to tell his story from. He smiled when Brian sat down and pulled him back into his lap.

David sat quietly for a minute. "You know, it doesn't really matter why, does it? Nothing I say will change anything or convince you to forgive me. What I did was stupid, wrong, and it almost destroyed someone who's only crime was that he loved too much." David stood up and walked over to Michael. He tried not to notice that Brian's arm tightened protectively around Michael's waist. He couldn't blame Brian for being uneasy. "But I am sorry Michael. More than you will ever know. For Justin's and Hank's sake do you think you could forgive me?"

Michael looked at David for a long minute. "David, I forgave you a long time ago. Then I forgot about it. It wasn't until Gus started asking questions that I even gave Portland a second thought. But I still would like to know why."

David sighed in resignation. "Jealousy and insecurities. I thought that without Brian around, you didn't need anyone else and I was angry when you did. So I tried to cage you, forgetting what happens when you cage something against its will. It will either die, or break out. And I'm glad that you broke out."

Michael eased out of Brian's arms and stood next to David. "Have you gotten help for your problems?"

"Yes I have. And Hank is nothing like me. He's much easier going than I am, and he doesn't have a need to control everything in his life." David didn't think that anyone was concerned about Hank turning out like his father, but he felt better for saying it.

Michael hugged David warmly. He would always fondly remember the beginnings of their relationship.

Brian walked up behind them and removed David's arms from around Michael. He couldn't see David's hand touching him without thinking of those hands inflicting physical harm. "No touching. If I see your hands on Mikey, I won' t be responsible for my actions. I can deal with you being in our lives, but not that." Brian's hazel eyes met Michael's deep chocolate ones and begged f or understanding. It wasn't that he didn't trust him, it was that he didn't trust himself. Not yet.

"Brian, I understand." Michael knew why Brian asked for the one small thing. It would take time for Brian to stop imagining David's hands hitting him.

Hank and Justin walked over to the trio. Justin pulled Michael aside while Hank talked to his father. "Are you ok?"

Michael smiled at his best friend. "I'm fine Boy Wonder. Think he's going to be ok?" Michael nodded in Brian's direction.

"As long as you're ok, and as long as he never sees David touch you, then yes, I think he'll be fine." Justin watched his lover try to comfort his father. Justin was struck by the tenderness and compassion disguised by the sexiest man he'd ever seen. That's when it happened. Justin felt every molecule of his body shift and his breath felt tight in his chest.

Michael saw the look of pure wonder on Justin's face and enjoyed watching his best friend land head over heels.

Justin gasped. "Wow! Is that what you felt?"

Michael smiled. "Yeah, but I was fourteen. I didn't know what the hell I was feeling. It's amazing isn't it?"

"How did you live for so long without exploding? Not being able to express it?" Justin and Michael had never had this conversation before because Justin had never been in love and would have had no idea what Michael was talking about. "I never loved Brian."

"No you didn't. You loved him as much as you could, but he wasn't the one. That feeling you just got, that's only possible when you've found the other half of yourself." Michael's eyes ran over his lover's tight body. Sometimes he couldn't believe that he'd been in love with this man for more than 35 years. "As for how I lived with it, sometimes I wasn't sure I was. Most of the time I just tried to ignore it; tried to pretend it didn't exist."

Justin could only stare at his best friend, wondering how Michael had survived for so long with this mass of swirling emotion. "I'm sorry."

"For what?"

"For every time that I rubbed my relationship with Brian in your face. For taking him from you."

Michael sighed. He couldn't believe that after twenty years of friendship and love, Justin was feeling guilty about that. "Boy Wonder, you couldn't take him from me, I never had him. And he wasn't ready for the type of relationship I needed. You helped him with that. I won't pretend that it didn't hurt, but everything happened the way it was supposed to."

"What? When did you start believing in fate?"

"When I met Ben. Think about it. If you hadn't been standing under that street light that night, if Brian hadn't looked over at just the right moment, would you be here now? Would you have met Hank? Would I have Rage? No, no, and no. I probably wouldn't even have Brian. Have you been worrying about this for twenty years?"

Justin smiled, "Well, no. I just thought that I should apologize. I thought some pretty bad things about you."

"That's ok. I thought some pretty bad things about you." Michael laughed at the "who me" look of innocence Justin was trying to pass off as genuine. Michael pulled his best friend into his arms. "Congratulations Justin. Be happy."

"I will." Justin held on to Michael for a minute, then pulled away. "Now, let's do something about dinner." He walked over to Hank and pulled him into his arms. Michael watched in amusement as Hank looked at Justin with the same look of absolute adoration that Michael had been giving Brian for two decades.

Michael didn't fool himself that this would be easy. There were decades of bad blood between Brian and David, and tonight's revelations didn't help. But everything was out in the open now; maybe it would work out after all.

Brian joined him, standing behind him with his arms around Michael's chest. "I love you so much, do you know that?" He leaned down and nuzzled Michael's neck, causing a shudder to run through Michael's body.

"I know. Now behave. Look at them." Michael nodded in Justin and Hank's direction. They were talking to David, but their attention was focused on each other. "Justin felt it today."

"That moment where he realizes that he'll never be alone again? That Hank is a part of him?" Brian remembered that feeling, but he was sad that he hadn't realized what it was.

"Yeah. I saw it happen. It was so romantic. When did you feel it?" Michael wondered why they'd never talked about this before. Maybe because even after all these years, he hadn't realized what that moment was. At the time, it hadn't seemed any more important than the thousands of other feeling he'd gotten around Brian.

"Mr. Jeffery's class. I walked in, saw you, and felt it. I just never realized what it meant. I just knew that I had to be close to you. How about you?"

"It was when you asked if you could eat lunch with me. I'd been trying not to stare at you; I couldn't let my feelings show. But then you were standing in front of me. Your face said that you didn't care whether I said yes or not, but your eyes told a different story. I could see the shyness and uncertainty in your gorgeous hazel eyes. That's when I felt it. But like you, I had no idea what it meant."

Brian turned Michael around in his arms, needing to feel his lover's arms around him. He still thanked whatever gods were on duty that day more than 35 years ago for sending him to Michael. He bent down and gently kissed Michael's lips, caressing them with his tongue. Michael slid his long tongue along Brian's lower lip, silently asking permission to be let in. Brian softly opened his lips and allowed Michael access to the warmth of his mouth.

Across the room, three men watched with various reactions. David was slightly sad, but also envious and relieved. Michael was ok and loved. He felt a pang of regret that he'd never found anyone to love, but he was thankful for the time he'd spent with Michael.

Hank couldn't help but be swept up in the fury of the passion that the two men in front of him created. He only hoped that he and Justin had that same aura one day.

Justin knew that after twenty years he should be used to them when they got this way, but he couldn't do it. But this time, there was no envy in his gaze, only appreciation and love. He'd finally found what they had. Turning to the two men staring at his friends, he laughed. "Let's go into the kitchen and see if dinner's still edible."

"What about those two?" David followed Justin and Hank into the kitchen.

Hank laughed. "Do you really think they'll miss us, or need food?"

With a last sigh of regret, David turned away from the sight in front of him. "No, I guess you're right."

Justin closed the kitchen door, leaving the Dynamic Duo the way they were always meant to be. Together.


End file.
